Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
I am a newbie...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 229991" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Sounds like his methods are working perfectly -- for him. He'll try asking and if that doesn't work, he'll go to nagging. Next is yelling and stomping. And, then, of course, comes the violence or just taking off and doing what he wants. Sadly, that doesn't work for the rest of the household.</p><p> </p><p>If you say no, you have to stick to the no. He doesn't need explanations at this point. If he ups the ante, you let him know the consequences of yelling, stomping, getting violent, taking off and you follow through. Easy? Nope, not in the least. Necessary, as a former vice presidential candidate would say, You betchya.</p><p> </p><p>Decide on what the consequences are ahead of time and tell him what the consequence is for each specific behavior. For the violence and running away, I would call the police.</p><p> </p><p>He needs to quit running the household. His way has worked for a very, very long time. It is going to take a very, very long time to untrain him and you and your wife.</p><p> </p><p>I found that with my daughter when I finally decided to take control that the more she knew in advance, the better in the long run. Yes, she tested and, boy, did she test but I followed through every time. It took a few years but she did start changing some of the behaviors. Of course, she found new ones but at least she knew I would stand firm in the consequences for the new stuff and they quit a lot sooner.</p><p> </p><p>Some things you might want to consider: he slams doors, the doors come off the hinges; he stomps around the house, his shoes are stored away and only put on outside; he yells, you fine him; he destroys property or hits someone or something, the police are called; he takes off, the police are called. Do give him a safe place where he can let out his anger and frustration -- a separate, empty room, a corner in the garage, whatever. Just somewhere where he can yell, throw things, stomp all he wants.</p><p> </p><p>Good luck! I hope you find some answers as to what is causing his problems but it really does sound like a lot of his actions are entirely under his control.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 229991, member: 3626"] Sounds like his methods are working perfectly -- for him. He'll try asking and if that doesn't work, he'll go to nagging. Next is yelling and stomping. And, then, of course, comes the violence or just taking off and doing what he wants. Sadly, that doesn't work for the rest of the household. If you say no, you have to stick to the no. He doesn't need explanations at this point. If he ups the ante, you let him know the consequences of yelling, stomping, getting violent, taking off and you follow through. Easy? Nope, not in the least. Necessary, as a former vice presidential candidate would say, You betchya. Decide on what the consequences are ahead of time and tell him what the consequence is for each specific behavior. For the violence and running away, I would call the police. He needs to quit running the household. His way has worked for a very, very long time. It is going to take a very, very long time to untrain him and you and your wife. I found that with my daughter when I finally decided to take control that the more she knew in advance, the better in the long run. Yes, she tested and, boy, did she test but I followed through every time. It took a few years but she did start changing some of the behaviors. Of course, she found new ones but at least she knew I would stand firm in the consequences for the new stuff and they quit a lot sooner. Some things you might want to consider: he slams doors, the doors come off the hinges; he stomps around the house, his shoes are stored away and only put on outside; he yells, you fine him; he destroys property or hits someone or something, the police are called; he takes off, the police are called. Do give him a safe place where he can let out his anger and frustration -- a separate, empty room, a corner in the garage, whatever. Just somewhere where he can yell, throw things, stomp all he wants. Good luck! I hope you find some answers as to what is causing his problems but it really does sound like a lot of his actions are entirely under his control. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
I am a newbie...
Top