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I am at my wits end with my sons school
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<blockquote data-quote="rlsnights" data-source="post: 426312" data-attributes="member: 7948"><p>OMG welcome to the board. Triplets??? Well congrats and boy I sure hope you guys have some help. Twins was intense - I can only imagine with triplets.</p><p></p><p>Lose the pediatrician. Jeez. They should not (in my humble opinion) be prescribing mind altering substances to children as a general rule. You have a kid with severe anxiety. He needs therapeutic support and maybe medication support. The first is supplied by a therapist. The latter by a child psychiatrist. You need to skip the peds and go straight to the psychiatrist (psychiatrist). You can medicate his ADHD all you want but if he's extremely anxious I doubt it will make a significant difference in his ability to focus. That's because the real reason he can't focus now is ******anxiety ******* not ADHD. I'm not a doctor and could be totally wrong about that but it sure was true with my kid.</p><p></p><p>I'm not sure if a neuropsychological evaluation is warranted with your kiddo. He has a lot going on in his life to overwhelm him what with younger triplet sibs.</p><p></p><p>If he was already anxious and quirky, had any developmental delays in his milestones or language processing issues, sensory issues, perseverative behaviors (does the same thing over and over and over or makes the same demands over and over and over and over), cannot do transitions without exploding or losing it or any other odd behaviors then I think a neuropsychologist evaluation is in order. </p><p></p><p>You could also talk this over with his therapist since you may not really remember what your son was like before you had the triplets. I know I hardly remember the first 2 years with my twins cause we were only getting 2 to 4 straight hours of sleep a night. If you kept a baby book or journal of his first couple years go back and read through that to see if you remarked on anything odd about his behavior then.</p><p></p><p>A good neuropsychologist evaluation will give you a ton of information about your son's brain and the way it works and it will point to other areas that may need additional assessment like language processing. Since you're on medicaid it will probably be really hard to get a TAR for this unless he has some pretty serious issues but it never hurts to ask.</p><p></p><p>I would ask your pharmacist about whether they have any suggestions for help with medication costs. Sometimes drug makers have special programs to help people pay for expensive medications. Once your psychiatrist has decided which type of medications are needed ask him if he can give you samples to start with or if he knows if there's a generic or if medicaid covers the medication he's prescribing. If he knows your situation he should be sympathetic and able to tailor his prescribing somewhat to generics and lower cost psychiatric medications.</p><p></p><p>School -</p><p></p><p>Your son should have an IEP not a 504. He needs modifications to his homework at the minimum. I suggest you write a letter to special education at the school district and request an assessment for special education. Your letter needs to tell they why you believe your son is a child with a disability who needs help in order to be able to benefit from his education (do not use phrases like "fulfill his potential"). Mention his diagnoses (Generalized Anxiety and related Insomnia? Depression? ADHD and anything else the therapist or psychiatrist can give him that might help you get him services/support) and describe your concerns.</p><p></p><p>When you send the letter you need to make sure you have a way of proving that it was received. Someone can hand deliver it and have them date stamp it and give you a copy of the date stamped letter. You can send it express or certified or any delivery method that gets you a signature as proof of delivery. You can fax or e-mail it but I would back it up with a mailed copy that gets you proof of receipt.</p><p></p><p>You should also give a copy to the principal and let them know you want your son assessed for Special Education.</p><p></p><p>I would be concerned that he will soon begin school refusal (if he hasn't already) due to his anxiety and the homework b&ll. School refusal is a tough nut to crack once it starts so if you think or see that this is going to start happening/has already started I would mention that in your letter.</p><p></p><p>In a nutshell the difference between a 504 plan and an IEP is accommodation vs. modification.</p><p></p><p>A 504 plan levels the playing field by making accommodations that allow the student to do what everyone else is doing. If he can't focus in class perhaps he gets a written outline from the teacher to follow along as she lectures. He might be seated away from distractions like the door, pencil sharpener, trashcan, open windows. The teacher might touch his shoulder and have him repeat instructions to help make sure he got the info. The instruction and environment are basically unchanged. The curriculum is not modified.</p><p></p><p>An IEP allows the student to learn the same basic things as everyone else but to some degree the curriculum is modified or changed to make it accessible to him. If his anxiety is making it very difficult for him to complete homework because he's afraid he's doing it wrong then his IEP might call for little or no homework. Or the amount he completes is accepted and graded based on the completed part without penalty for the incomplete sections. If his anxiety is causing sleep deprivation and the school environment is a source of anxiety (of course it is) then modifications to the length of his school day, the start time, or the environment are made. Perhaps placement in a smaller class or half day in the resource room with Special Education teacher would be needed. These kinds of modifications can only be done through an IEP.</p><p></p><p>I know you are overwhelmed but you want to ask the school to do the Special Education assessment right away before the end of the school year gets here. It's unlikely they will complete a full assessment before the end of school or may just finish it at the end. You want to be well along in the process before 4th grade gets here. 4th grade is a time of big changes academically. The academic expectations take a big leap and kids who were barely making it before that - all of sudden it seems like they are tanking. And they are. You want to get ahead of that ball now.</p><p></p><p>If you have more questions about the stuff with school you might want to post it in the Special Education 101 section.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there. I hope you have a therapist of your own. But maybe just an extra hour of sleep a day would do you?</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p></p><p>Patricia</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rlsnights, post: 426312, member: 7948"] OMG welcome to the board. Triplets??? Well congrats and boy I sure hope you guys have some help. Twins was intense - I can only imagine with triplets. Lose the pediatrician. Jeez. They should not (in my humble opinion) be prescribing mind altering substances to children as a general rule. You have a kid with severe anxiety. He needs therapeutic support and maybe medication support. The first is supplied by a therapist. The latter by a child psychiatrist. You need to skip the peds and go straight to the psychiatrist (psychiatrist). You can medicate his ADHD all you want but if he's extremely anxious I doubt it will make a significant difference in his ability to focus. That's because the real reason he can't focus now is ******anxiety ******* not ADHD. I'm not a doctor and could be totally wrong about that but it sure was true with my kid. I'm not sure if a neuropsychological evaluation is warranted with your kiddo. He has a lot going on in his life to overwhelm him what with younger triplet sibs. If he was already anxious and quirky, had any developmental delays in his milestones or language processing issues, sensory issues, perseverative behaviors (does the same thing over and over and over or makes the same demands over and over and over and over), cannot do transitions without exploding or losing it or any other odd behaviors then I think a neuropsychologist evaluation is in order. You could also talk this over with his therapist since you may not really remember what your son was like before you had the triplets. I know I hardly remember the first 2 years with my twins cause we were only getting 2 to 4 straight hours of sleep a night. If you kept a baby book or journal of his first couple years go back and read through that to see if you remarked on anything odd about his behavior then. A good neuropsychologist evaluation will give you a ton of information about your son's brain and the way it works and it will point to other areas that may need additional assessment like language processing. Since you're on medicaid it will probably be really hard to get a TAR for this unless he has some pretty serious issues but it never hurts to ask. I would ask your pharmacist about whether they have any suggestions for help with medication costs. Sometimes drug makers have special programs to help people pay for expensive medications. Once your psychiatrist has decided which type of medications are needed ask him if he can give you samples to start with or if he knows if there's a generic or if medicaid covers the medication he's prescribing. If he knows your situation he should be sympathetic and able to tailor his prescribing somewhat to generics and lower cost psychiatric medications. School - Your son should have an IEP not a 504. He needs modifications to his homework at the minimum. I suggest you write a letter to special education at the school district and request an assessment for special education. Your letter needs to tell they why you believe your son is a child with a disability who needs help in order to be able to benefit from his education (do not use phrases like "fulfill his potential"). Mention his diagnoses (Generalized Anxiety and related Insomnia? Depression? ADHD and anything else the therapist or psychiatrist can give him that might help you get him services/support) and describe your concerns. When you send the letter you need to make sure you have a way of proving that it was received. Someone can hand deliver it and have them date stamp it and give you a copy of the date stamped letter. You can send it express or certified or any delivery method that gets you a signature as proof of delivery. You can fax or e-mail it but I would back it up with a mailed copy that gets you proof of receipt. You should also give a copy to the principal and let them know you want your son assessed for Special Education. I would be concerned that he will soon begin school refusal (if he hasn't already) due to his anxiety and the homework b&ll. School refusal is a tough nut to crack once it starts so if you think or see that this is going to start happening/has already started I would mention that in your letter. In a nutshell the difference between a 504 plan and an IEP is accommodation vs. modification. A 504 plan levels the playing field by making accommodations that allow the student to do what everyone else is doing. If he can't focus in class perhaps he gets a written outline from the teacher to follow along as she lectures. He might be seated away from distractions like the door, pencil sharpener, trashcan, open windows. The teacher might touch his shoulder and have him repeat instructions to help make sure he got the info. The instruction and environment are basically unchanged. The curriculum is not modified. An IEP allows the student to learn the same basic things as everyone else but to some degree the curriculum is modified or changed to make it accessible to him. If his anxiety is making it very difficult for him to complete homework because he's afraid he's doing it wrong then his IEP might call for little or no homework. Or the amount he completes is accepted and graded based on the completed part without penalty for the incomplete sections. If his anxiety is causing sleep deprivation and the school environment is a source of anxiety (of course it is) then modifications to the length of his school day, the start time, or the environment are made. Perhaps placement in a smaller class or half day in the resource room with Special Education teacher would be needed. These kinds of modifications can only be done through an IEP. I know you are overwhelmed but you want to ask the school to do the Special Education assessment right away before the end of the school year gets here. It's unlikely they will complete a full assessment before the end of school or may just finish it at the end. You want to be well along in the process before 4th grade gets here. 4th grade is a time of big changes academically. The academic expectations take a big leap and kids who were barely making it before that - all of sudden it seems like they are tanking. And they are. You want to get ahead of that ball now. If you have more questions about the stuff with school you might want to post it in the Special Education 101 section. Hang in there. I hope you have a therapist of your own. But maybe just an extra hour of sleep a day would do you? Hugs, Patricia [/QUOTE]
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