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I am sad and desperate and hopeless again
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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 745511" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>So I will tell you a story about my sister.</p><p></p><p>She had 3 boys by one husband. Got divorced and had a boy by her second husband.</p><p></p><p>The youngest was so very very smart. He was spoiled rotten when he was a boy. She was a single parent (again) and he completely manipulated her. I really did not like to be around him when he was young. Fast forward to high school. He got into a lot of fights (not sure why) but was very smart. No drug etc. issues. </p><p></p><p>After high school he wanted to go to college in Hawaii. Huh? She actually lived with a friend so that she could afford to pay his way. He did very well in college so in many ways she felt justified for this expense. After college he moved back to Chicago and got a great job as a trader. He was doing well. She gave him a huge amount of money to manage for her. He lost it all.</p><p></p><p>He then decided he did not want to be a trader anymore so quit. In fact, he didn't want to work at all. He was milking her for money constantly. She didn't have it. Her other 3 older boys were self sufficient and they did not go to college. They were angry.</p><p></p><p>Then youngest decided he wanted to be a monk. A monk? WTH? He was never religious. Not even sure what a monk does. Long story short she has paid for many plane flights all over the country for him. He is now pushing 40. (She is 76). He is now back in Hawaii. Bottom line is he does not want to work or live a conventional life. Is he mentally ill? We don't know. We don't think so. He is a drifter. That is how he has chosen to live his life. She has so struggled with this.</p><p></p><p>She and I are out of touch for several years - long story - but I know she has had to accept this is how he chooses to live. Why I told this story is sometimes we have to accept things we cannot change.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 745511, member: 15032"] So I will tell you a story about my sister. She had 3 boys by one husband. Got divorced and had a boy by her second husband. The youngest was so very very smart. He was spoiled rotten when he was a boy. She was a single parent (again) and he completely manipulated her. I really did not like to be around him when he was young. Fast forward to high school. He got into a lot of fights (not sure why) but was very smart. No drug etc. issues. After high school he wanted to go to college in Hawaii. Huh? She actually lived with a friend so that she could afford to pay his way. He did very well in college so in many ways she felt justified for this expense. After college he moved back to Chicago and got a great job as a trader. He was doing well. She gave him a huge amount of money to manage for her. He lost it all. He then decided he did not want to be a trader anymore so quit. In fact, he didn't want to work at all. He was milking her for money constantly. She didn't have it. Her other 3 older boys were self sufficient and they did not go to college. They were angry. Then youngest decided he wanted to be a monk. A monk? WTH? He was never religious. Not even sure what a monk does. Long story short she has paid for many plane flights all over the country for him. He is now pushing 40. (She is 76). He is now back in Hawaii. Bottom line is he does not want to work or live a conventional life. Is he mentally ill? We don't know. We don't think so. He is a drifter. That is how he has chosen to live his life. She has so struggled with this. She and I are out of touch for several years - long story - but I know she has had to accept this is how he chooses to live. Why I told this story is sometimes we have to accept things we cannot change. [/QUOTE]
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