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General Parenting
I am so sick of the constant negativity
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 95181" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>H...</p><p></p><p>As you know, I tend to find the negative in most situations too. Im trying to think of this from W's perspective and see if I can even attempt to offer any plausible solutions.</p><p></p><p>She is negative and whines about everything because she has this empty hole inside her that cant figure out how fill for herself yet. She doesnt have the tools to self sooth. Her emotional regulation tools are missing and so she is looking at you to fill her every emotional need. You are her emotional compass. You have to be her everything. Because of this she feels torn. She both loves you and hates you for her neediness. She wants you to make things right but she doesnt want you to do it also. This causes her to reject everything you say completely out of turn. It doesnt matter if it was something that she really wanted or thinks would work, you said it, it cant be or work. </p><p></p><p>Does any of this sound plausible?</p><p></p><p>(Can you tell what Im working on in therapy? LOL)</p><p></p><p>I am so like this in many ways. There are times that I get so out of hand that I will get angry because my needs arent being met and nothing anyone does is good enough for me. I cant even state what need it is that I want met, I just know that they arent being met and a meltdown is fixing to follow.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 95181, member: 1514"] H... As you know, I tend to find the negative in most situations too. Im trying to think of this from W's perspective and see if I can even attempt to offer any plausible solutions. She is negative and whines about everything because she has this empty hole inside her that cant figure out how fill for herself yet. She doesnt have the tools to self sooth. Her emotional regulation tools are missing and so she is looking at you to fill her every emotional need. You are her emotional compass. You have to be her everything. Because of this she feels torn. She both loves you and hates you for her neediness. She wants you to make things right but she doesnt want you to do it also. This causes her to reject everything you say completely out of turn. It doesnt matter if it was something that she really wanted or thinks would work, you said it, it cant be or work. Does any of this sound plausible? (Can you tell what Im working on in therapy? LOL) I am so like this in many ways. There are times that I get so out of hand that I will get angry because my needs arent being met and nothing anyone does is good enough for me. I cant even state what need it is that I want met, I just know that they arent being met and a meltdown is fixing to follow. [/QUOTE]
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I am so sick of the constant negativity
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