Hello Missinghr,
I'm so glad you are here to get the support you need to help deal with your situation. I'm sad that you need to be here.
I agree that this could definitely be depression and that if you can get your daughter a full workup that would be a good start for her.
I'm so sorry you are going through this, you need to know it is not your fault. I can totally understand your feeling about wondering if you'd feel more sad or relieved if she went away. I am living a bit of both right now. difficult child has been both home and away recently and is currently away again - and I'm not sure if he'll be coming home any time soon. It's very difficult. You think about this problem non-stop whether they are home or not. The only relief with them being not home is there is some sense of calm and peace in the home. That said, I'm sure there's another way to get that calm and peace for yourself. Maybe a massage appointment? A mani/pedi? It is so nice to have someone care for you when you are feeling uncared for.
Hang in there - if you give some background information there are many people here that are knowledgeable and give great info and advice.
