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<blockquote data-quote="Sam3" data-source="post: 722610" data-attributes="member: 19290"><p>It doesn't seem like either of you know her abilities. Your assumption that she can't make it, doesn't excuse her lack of effort in finding out. </p><p></p><p>If she lacks internal motivation, then she has to have external motivation. </p><p></p><p>I would come up with a few alternatives for her to get involved with and start conditioning your support on her spending X hours per day or week being productive out of the house. Therapy, church or youth groups, part time job or volunteer work (heal the bay?). </p><p></p><p>I would start planting the seed that you are temporarily supporting her as an adult while she considers what she wants her future to look like. I would be very clear that it won't be spent in your proverbial basement.</p><p></p><p>Spend enough time here to regain your moral authority.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sam3, post: 722610, member: 19290"] It doesn't seem like either of you know her abilities. Your assumption that she can't make it, doesn't excuse her lack of effort in finding out. If she lacks internal motivation, then she has to have external motivation. I would come up with a few alternatives for her to get involved with and start conditioning your support on her spending X hours per day or week being productive out of the house. Therapy, church or youth groups, part time job or volunteer work (heal the bay?). I would start planting the seed that you are temporarily supporting her as an adult while she considers what she wants her future to look like. I would be very clear that it won't be spent in your proverbial basement. Spend enough time here to regain your moral authority. [/QUOTE]
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