He sounds depressed...and perhaps, as you suggest, smoking a lot of pot. My older son fights depression always, and the more he smokes the lazier he gets. When I cut him off of all money (unless he works for it) that is when he decided he needed to get a job. I got him his first job...he walked out six months later because of the drama (bad supervision of employees). I understood why he walked out, but counseled him that he should have given two weeks notice even though the conditions were unreasonable. I told him I am all out of friends that can give him a job, so he will have to do it on his own. He did! He just started a new job this past week. It's fast food, but it's something. Now I just have to find a way to get him motivated to go to the community college to start working on a trade.
If you can get him into rehab, do it. We had to give an ultimatum to our son: live somewhere else or go to rehab and participate. He chose rehab...we haven't had the perfect outcome, but he is so much better than he was before. Plus, I think it helped set the boundary that we weren't going to put up with his shenanigans.
