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I feel guilty about not liking her
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<blockquote data-quote="Katie H" data-source="post: 10539" data-attributes="member: 2640"><p>Hi TM,</p><p></p><p>You have already gotten some great advice and feedback. I just wanted to add that I don't think this kind of behavior is that unusual at this age. Not saying the behavior is okay, just that it seems to be a kindergarten thing. My daughter is always coming home with stories about one girl refusing to play with another, this girl is mad at that girl and they are no longer friends, etc. Since my daughter has Asperger's it is all very confusing to her. I try to explain that no matter what anyone else does or says she just needs to be nice to everyone and try to include anyone who wants to play.</p><p></p><p>Sadly, there is one girl that is excluded regularly. She is picked on for her clothes (although they wear uniforms my daughter says she wears the same thing every day). She is the sweetest girl and I have encouraged my daughter to be nice to her. But, the friends my daughter plays with are mean to her when she is nice to this girl. Sheesh, I thought it did not get this bad till junior high. I am amazed at the playground politics of it all!! My poor daughter is just struggling to figure it all out. </p><p></p><p>Anyhow just have to share that this morning my daughter said, "Mommy, I want to do something nice. I want you to set up a playdate for me and J (the picked on girl). She can come over and we can play dress up. Then she will feel like she has a friend." I was so proud of her. And the "experts" say children with Asperger's can't have empathy - HA - phooey on them. Anyway, I saw the girls mom and asked her for a playdate and she seemed just thrilled her daughter had been invited.</p><p></p><p>Guess what I am trying to say is that Duckie is obviously in a complicated situation that she is trying to understand. It sounds like you are giving her great guidance on how to handle the situation. That is really all you can do. </p><p></p><p>Take care,</p><p></p><p>Katie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Katie H, post: 10539, member: 2640"] Hi TM, You have already gotten some great advice and feedback. I just wanted to add that I don't think this kind of behavior is that unusual at this age. Not saying the behavior is okay, just that it seems to be a kindergarten thing. My daughter is always coming home with stories about one girl refusing to play with another, this girl is mad at that girl and they are no longer friends, etc. Since my daughter has Asperger's it is all very confusing to her. I try to explain that no matter what anyone else does or says she just needs to be nice to everyone and try to include anyone who wants to play. Sadly, there is one girl that is excluded regularly. She is picked on for her clothes (although they wear uniforms my daughter says she wears the same thing every day). She is the sweetest girl and I have encouraged my daughter to be nice to her. But, the friends my daughter plays with are mean to her when she is nice to this girl. Sheesh, I thought it did not get this bad till junior high. I am amazed at the playground politics of it all!! My poor daughter is just struggling to figure it all out. Anyhow just have to share that this morning my daughter said, "Mommy, I want to do something nice. I want you to set up a playdate for me and J (the picked on girl). She can come over and we can play dress up. Then she will feel like she has a friend." I was so proud of her. And the "experts" say children with Asperger's can't have empathy - HA - phooey on them. Anyway, I saw the girls mom and asked her for a playdate and she seemed just thrilled her daughter had been invited. Guess what I am trying to say is that Duckie is obviously in a complicated situation that she is trying to understand. It sounds like you are giving her great guidance on how to handle the situation. That is really all you can do. Take care, Katie [/QUOTE]
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