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I Feel Like a Loser
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<blockquote data-quote="Tiredof33" data-source="post: 599166" data-attributes="member: 13558"><p>My problems with my teen difficult child made me feel more the loser part than now. When I was a single parent, struggling to put food on the table, and my difficult child took advantage of the fact to run wild, I was told by school admin and police that I had to do something to reel in my out of control son. I sometimes wonder if I had quit work and gone on welfare would my difficult child turned out different.</p><p></p><p>The fact that all of my vacation time, time not working, and money was spent TRYING to get him into a program that helped was overlooked. I felt like the worlds biggest loser! My difficult child knew of my guilt and used it against me for many years before I finally convinced myself I did the very best I could. Now when he tells me about the drug infested neighborhood we lived in I remind him it was his choice to sneak out the window and use drugs with his friends.</p><p></p><p>Like RE, I steer clear of people reminding me of the many things I did wrong. I don't discuss my difficult child with family, or really anyone other than limited with my hubby and daughter. I need to get away from it and constantly being reminded makes me feel low.</p><p></p><p>I watch the difficult child's drama cause divisions in a lot of my family. A true difficult child is out for themselves, regardless of who they have to steam roll to get what they want. And most want a free ride! Your sister will see their true colors soon enough, if not, thank the heavens above someone was actually able to get them gainfully employed etc. And then, can I send my difficult child for her to fix lol???</p><p></p><p>I have found things to keep me busy (and I enjoy) that do not involve family or difficult children. It's wonderful to go out and get away from problems. Keep an open mind with your sister, and try very hard to not say, 'I told you so' I just had this opportunity with a close relative and they truly do not understand until they walk in your shoes.</p><p>(((blessings and peace)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiredof33, post: 599166, member: 13558"] My problems with my teen difficult child made me feel more the loser part than now. When I was a single parent, struggling to put food on the table, and my difficult child took advantage of the fact to run wild, I was told by school admin and police that I had to do something to reel in my out of control son. I sometimes wonder if I had quit work and gone on welfare would my difficult child turned out different. The fact that all of my vacation time, time not working, and money was spent TRYING to get him into a program that helped was overlooked. I felt like the worlds biggest loser! My difficult child knew of my guilt and used it against me for many years before I finally convinced myself I did the very best I could. Now when he tells me about the drug infested neighborhood we lived in I remind him it was his choice to sneak out the window and use drugs with his friends. Like RE, I steer clear of people reminding me of the many things I did wrong. I don't discuss my difficult child with family, or really anyone other than limited with my hubby and daughter. I need to get away from it and constantly being reminded makes me feel low. I watch the difficult child's drama cause divisions in a lot of my family. A true difficult child is out for themselves, regardless of who they have to steam roll to get what they want. And most want a free ride! Your sister will see their true colors soon enough, if not, thank the heavens above someone was actually able to get them gainfully employed etc. And then, can I send my difficult child for her to fix lol??? I have found things to keep me busy (and I enjoy) that do not involve family or difficult children. It's wonderful to go out and get away from problems. Keep an open mind with your sister, and try very hard to not say, 'I told you so' I just had this opportunity with a close relative and they truly do not understand until they walk in your shoes. (((blessings and peace))) [/QUOTE]
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