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I feel like I shouldnt have been a parent...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 608908" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi there. I'm sorry you're in such a bad place. You are not a bad mother nor did this happen because of you. Obviously something is wrong with both kids and that makes sense because of heredity. Also, I don't recall your story, but early chaos ages infancy-3 can cause massive behavioral problems...don't know if that happened to your kids or not. Either way, they can be helped, but they need to be diagnosed first. </p><p></p><p>I am going to tell you that I have been in a psychiatric ward to get diagnosed and treated. This was in the day when they actually let you stay there for long periods of time to get sorted out before you were discharged. I was in for ten weeks. They don't do that anymore. P hospital admission is strictly to deal with crises-to-crises. You won't get any big answers in a p hospital. Now if your kids are suicidal or homicidal, yes, go to a hospital. Otherwise, your best bet is still a neuropsychologist and ongoing care outside of a hospital...and probably, at least in the case of your son, medication. Some kids need medication to function. Period. I hate medication with all I've got, but *I* have to take it or I can't function. </p><p></p><p>Your daughter could be on the spectrum, in which case she may have a hard time expressing or showing any emotion. Some Aspies have a rather stoic look about them all the time and don't like being touched and can't handle change of any kind. Not saying she has it, but she could. That would be one explanation of why she seems to be rejecting you. </p><p></p><p>Your son seems to have more serious symptoms. He is the one I am wondering about as far as an unstable first three years...were there many caregivers coming and going? Did he experience chaos? </p><p></p><p>If not, think about your children's genetic family tree on both sides of the DNA. That could lead you to an answer that you probably won't get, at least for your son, for a long time. He is still young. I am thinking he is way too extreme for ADHD..just my opinion. </p><p></p><p>I would get to that neuropsychologist ASAP. I would demand it from the pediatrician. If he won't offer the referral, I'd switch pediatricians. You can't live this way. You deserve better. You deserve peace and so do your kids, who are suffering too, but NOT NOT NOT because of how you parent them.</p><p></p><p>Hugs and remember to be kind to yourself. Remember that you are not causing this nor are you the only parent with children who are extremely difficult. Look at how many people belong to this board!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 608908, member: 1550"] Hi there. I'm sorry you're in such a bad place. You are not a bad mother nor did this happen because of you. Obviously something is wrong with both kids and that makes sense because of heredity. Also, I don't recall your story, but early chaos ages infancy-3 can cause massive behavioral problems...don't know if that happened to your kids or not. Either way, they can be helped, but they need to be diagnosed first. I am going to tell you that I have been in a psychiatric ward to get diagnosed and treated. This was in the day when they actually let you stay there for long periods of time to get sorted out before you were discharged. I was in for ten weeks. They don't do that anymore. P hospital admission is strictly to deal with crises-to-crises. You won't get any big answers in a p hospital. Now if your kids are suicidal or homicidal, yes, go to a hospital. Otherwise, your best bet is still a neuropsychologist and ongoing care outside of a hospital...and probably, at least in the case of your son, medication. Some kids need medication to function. Period. I hate medication with all I've got, but *I* have to take it or I can't function. Your daughter could be on the spectrum, in which case she may have a hard time expressing or showing any emotion. Some Aspies have a rather stoic look about them all the time and don't like being touched and can't handle change of any kind. Not saying she has it, but she could. That would be one explanation of why she seems to be rejecting you. Your son seems to have more serious symptoms. He is the one I am wondering about as far as an unstable first three years...were there many caregivers coming and going? Did he experience chaos? If not, think about your children's genetic family tree on both sides of the DNA. That could lead you to an answer that you probably won't get, at least for your son, for a long time. He is still young. I am thinking he is way too extreme for ADHD..just my opinion. I would get to that neuropsychologist ASAP. I would demand it from the pediatrician. If he won't offer the referral, I'd switch pediatricians. You can't live this way. You deserve better. You deserve peace and so do your kids, who are suffering too, but NOT NOT NOT because of how you parent them. Hugs and remember to be kind to yourself. Remember that you are not causing this nor are you the only parent with children who are extremely difficult. Look at how many people belong to this board!!! [/QUOTE]
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