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Substance Abuse
I give up....
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 686826" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>When we place our values on our kids shoulders we make it so hard for them and for us.</p><p></p><p>I know many people who post here have degrees and good jobs, so you maybe feel very good about this part of your life and want to share it with your kids. But many people aren't cut out for four year colleges, degrees and internships in China . Ok. I am just another peon off the street, but if that is what she wants to do and enjoys good for.her. thats all fine and good but...</p><p></p><p>Sorry, it doesnt impress me more than my son who didn't go to college at all yet worked his way up to a college level type job/salary. And I certainly dont feel as if that is more impressive than my brave, hardworking daughter who is a sweetie yet almost finished with her law enforcement degree. She'll make a great cop. My autistic son lives alone, works and is Mr. Nice and Happy. If you drop your groceries, he'll be the first person to run and pick them up for you. We were told he'd be a vegetsble. Um, hes NOT a vegetable AT ALL. He is my hero. I am proud of my daughter who put hersrlf through two years of college and won statewide cooking contests to become a pastry chef and is now the best stay at home mom. I am proud she said no to daycare. I am over the moon about both my grands...brilliant sweet eight year old (bart) and charming bright beautiful graddaughterb(princess). My kids are great parents. Their kids are so loved and to me that trumps any college degree.</p><p></p><p>None of my kids have a four year degree yet im as proud of them as if they had three degrees. They are good people, hard workers. A few had rough spots, which is why I sm here, but they triumphed. They won!!</p><p></p><p>We need to learn to stop comparing our house,our cars, our kids to what Mrs. Jones has. She has nothing to do with us. Her house, her job, her car, her kids are hers and ours are ours and we will be unhappy forever if we keep negatively comparing our lives to that of Mrs. Jones. And we dont know what really goes on in her house when the doors are closed. Nor should we care.</p><p></p><p>I grew up in a very rich, very competitive,even meanspirited suburb. I never Did "get it." Never did understand the mean competition to have a bigger house or car, nicer clothes, a higher paying job...as a girl it used to amuse me. I never did it and left that place behind. Never did like it there.</p><p></p><p>I have many nerological and mental health challenges and have struggled, but I have always taken so much pleasure in the best things in life that money cant buy, like a soaring eagle in a cloudless sky. I have had challenges with a couple of my kids, but feel so much pride and gratitude when they achieve. F u to Mary Cary who has ten degrees. So what? I dont care. I have the best kids ever and a prestigious degree or job is immaterial to me if my kids are good people. It is easy for me to feel pride in my family. And you can keep your mansion. I love my homey, cozy apartment and pretty view and my beloved dofs sitting next to me. I am glad if you have a mansion you love, but not envious. I am me. You are you.</p><p></p><p>Why did I write that?. Not sure. I guess maybe to share that that we CHOoSE what makes us happy. I feel its never good to hope our kids do what made us happy. They are not us and what made us happy may make them misersble.</p><p></p><p>Lastly, my husband to me is the best father ever and sonic snd jumper say so all the time. He did not work 60 hours a week to give us a huge house. But he was home in time to coach every single spirt,vto watch every game, to dry every tear. He was as involved in parenting as I was. The two kids he and I raised together...jumper and sonic...are the two happiest, most well balanced young people I know. My husband makes me so proud too. He is a mechanic (no college) and served our countrybin thebAir Force for telwelve years. Thanks, honey.</p><p></p><p>I hope this didnt offend anyone. It is just written by a differently wired mom with a different way of looking at things and who grew up to be very happy and contented. I may not have made much sense...lol. sorry if I rambled.</p><p></p><p>I live in gratitude for every little thing.</p><p></p><p>Love to all you lovely mothers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 686826, member: 1550"] When we place our values on our kids shoulders we make it so hard for them and for us. I know many people who post here have degrees and good jobs, so you maybe feel very good about this part of your life and want to share it with your kids. But many people aren't cut out for four year colleges, degrees and internships in China . Ok. I am just another peon off the street, but if that is what she wants to do and enjoys good for.her. thats all fine and good but... Sorry, it doesnt impress me more than my son who didn't go to college at all yet worked his way up to a college level type job/salary. And I certainly dont feel as if that is more impressive than my brave, hardworking daughter who is a sweetie yet almost finished with her law enforcement degree. She'll make a great cop. My autistic son lives alone, works and is Mr. Nice and Happy. If you drop your groceries, he'll be the first person to run and pick them up for you. We were told he'd be a vegetsble. Um, hes NOT a vegetable AT ALL. He is my hero. I am proud of my daughter who put hersrlf through two years of college and won statewide cooking contests to become a pastry chef and is now the best stay at home mom. I am proud she said no to daycare. I am over the moon about both my grands...brilliant sweet eight year old (bart) and charming bright beautiful graddaughterb(princess). My kids are great parents. Their kids are so loved and to me that trumps any college degree. None of my kids have a four year degree yet im as proud of them as if they had three degrees. They are good people, hard workers. A few had rough spots, which is why I sm here, but they triumphed. They won!! We need to learn to stop comparing our house,our cars, our kids to what Mrs. Jones has. She has nothing to do with us. Her house, her job, her car, her kids are hers and ours are ours and we will be unhappy forever if we keep negatively comparing our lives to that of Mrs. Jones. And we dont know what really goes on in her house when the doors are closed. Nor should we care. I grew up in a very rich, very competitive,even meanspirited suburb. I never Did "get it." Never did understand the mean competition to have a bigger house or car, nicer clothes, a higher paying job...as a girl it used to amuse me. I never did it and left that place behind. Never did like it there. I have many nerological and mental health challenges and have struggled, but I have always taken so much pleasure in the best things in life that money cant buy, like a soaring eagle in a cloudless sky. I have had challenges with a couple of my kids, but feel so much pride and gratitude when they achieve. F u to Mary Cary who has ten degrees. So what? I dont care. I have the best kids ever and a prestigious degree or job is immaterial to me if my kids are good people. It is easy for me to feel pride in my family. And you can keep your mansion. I love my homey, cozy apartment and pretty view and my beloved dofs sitting next to me. I am glad if you have a mansion you love, but not envious. I am me. You are you. Why did I write that?. Not sure. I guess maybe to share that that we CHOoSE what makes us happy. I feel its never good to hope our kids do what made us happy. They are not us and what made us happy may make them misersble. Lastly, my husband to me is the best father ever and sonic snd jumper say so all the time. He did not work 60 hours a week to give us a huge house. But he was home in time to coach every single spirt,vto watch every game, to dry every tear. He was as involved in parenting as I was. The two kids he and I raised together...jumper and sonic...are the two happiest, most well balanced young people I know. My husband makes me so proud too. He is a mechanic (no college) and served our countrybin thebAir Force for telwelve years. Thanks, honey. I hope this didnt offend anyone. It is just written by a differently wired mom with a different way of looking at things and who grew up to be very happy and contented. I may not have made much sense...lol. sorry if I rambled. I live in gratitude for every little thing. Love to all you lovely mothers. [/QUOTE]
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