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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 631236" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Lil, I just want to say that I think what you are doing, the back and forth, try a little of this, and a little of that, trying to be reasonable and changing with the situations he presents---I think all of that is simply....part of the journey. It is necessary. It is another step on the road to his becoming an adult---what kind of adult we don't know yet, but an adult. </p><p></p><p>Maybe, if it is to be, he will get his act together and get on a good path.</p><p></p><p>And then maybe, if it is to be, you will know that you tried everything in the world, no stone left unturned, and still nothing was changed.</p><p></p><p>It basically takes this. </p><p></p><p>It takes this kind of crazy dance, you leading and then them leading and both trying to follow, and a bunch of missed steps and mashed toes, to get there. Where-ever there is.</p><p></p><p>So......I would not take too much of this to heart. Try not to let it crush you. It is part of it. What you are doing is walking the road, Lil. And it is hard. </p><p></p><p>This is a parent's love for her son and his trying to figure his life out and what is next for him. </p><p></p><p>It's ugly. With our kids on this board, a lot of this is very ugly. And sad, and hard, and painful, and so many things.</p><p></p><p>If you can, even for a moment, try to see it from 40,000 feet. The aerial view. Take a big giant step back and try to look at it.</p><p></p><p>And then give yourself kudos, compassion and a lot of high fives for simply hanging in there, and trying.</p><p></p><p>Someday, the smoke will start to clear, and you'll say: Oh, THAT's why all of that happened. You won't laugh about it, Lil, or even smile, because it's been way too hard for that, but you'll start to see some meaning in it all.</p><p></p><p>Sleep well tonight, Lil. We're here for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 631236, member: 17542"] Lil, I just want to say that I think what you are doing, the back and forth, try a little of this, and a little of that, trying to be reasonable and changing with the situations he presents---I think all of that is simply....part of the journey. It is necessary. It is another step on the road to his becoming an adult---what kind of adult we don't know yet, but an adult. Maybe, if it is to be, he will get his act together and get on a good path. And then maybe, if it is to be, you will know that you tried everything in the world, no stone left unturned, and still nothing was changed. It basically takes this. It takes this kind of crazy dance, you leading and then them leading and both trying to follow, and a bunch of missed steps and mashed toes, to get there. Where-ever there is. So......I would not take too much of this to heart. Try not to let it crush you. It is part of it. What you are doing is walking the road, Lil. And it is hard. This is a parent's love for her son and his trying to figure his life out and what is next for him. It's ugly. With our kids on this board, a lot of this is very ugly. And sad, and hard, and painful, and so many things. If you can, even for a moment, try to see it from 40,000 feet. The aerial view. Take a big giant step back and try to look at it. And then give yourself kudos, compassion and a lot of high fives for simply hanging in there, and trying. Someday, the smoke will start to clear, and you'll say: Oh, THAT's why all of that happened. You won't laugh about it, Lil, or even smile, because it's been way too hard for that, but you'll start to see some meaning in it all. Sleep well tonight, Lil. We're here for you. [/QUOTE]
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