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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 645659" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Reminds me of that old joke, MWM, where the couple is on a first date and the guy keeps talking and talking about himself and after a long time of this he says, "Oh, I've been talking about ME for a long time, what do YOU think about ME?"</p><p></p><p>My daughter did that for years, it was like there was no one in the room except for her, her problems and her life.......we were just the audience to it. Didn't ask about anyone, didn't offer to help if she were over for dinner, always assumed you would pay the bill if you went out for a meal....would walk right by her own daughter and not say a word...it was difficult to be around. So, I hear you, I know what that's like. I think it's a common trait with our difficult child's, to be self focused, self serving and consumed with the self. </p><p></p><p>Last summer my daughter began to change and lo and behold, the rest of us showed up in her world. It's such a spectacular shift that it is immediately noticeable if you knew her before. She is appreciative, engaged, notices others, seems genuinely interested. I don't know what happened to change her, but it's an enormous change.</p><p></p><p>It's tough to be around that, the energy exchange is only one side giving and the other side taking, so the giver is depleted, it's as if they use the energy for their own purposes. I've heard it explained that narcissists see others as "food" and when the food supply is exhausted they simply move on to a new source. Somewhat chilling.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 645659, member: 13542"] Reminds me of that old joke, MWM, where the couple is on a first date and the guy keeps talking and talking about himself and after a long time of this he says, "Oh, I've been talking about ME for a long time, what do YOU think about ME?" My daughter did that for years, it was like there was no one in the room except for her, her problems and her life.......we were just the audience to it. Didn't ask about anyone, didn't offer to help if she were over for dinner, always assumed you would pay the bill if you went out for a meal....would walk right by her own daughter and not say a word...it was difficult to be around. So, I hear you, I know what that's like. I think it's a common trait with our difficult child's, to be self focused, self serving and consumed with the self. Last summer my daughter began to change and lo and behold, the rest of us showed up in her world. It's such a spectacular shift that it is immediately noticeable if you knew her before. She is appreciative, engaged, notices others, seems genuinely interested. I don't know what happened to change her, but it's an enormous change. It's tough to be around that, the energy exchange is only one side giving and the other side taking, so the giver is depleted, it's as if they use the energy for their own purposes. I've heard it explained that narcissists see others as "food" and when the food supply is exhausted they simply move on to a new source. Somewhat chilling. [/QUOTE]
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