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General Parenting
I knew it was bound to happen...(long)
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy423" data-source="post: 224123" data-attributes="member: 6118"><p>Are you in my house? OMG, that's so similar to how difficult child rages here too. We've gotten so much better in the last few years because she's gotten help with- coping skills thru school SW's. She does have a tv in her room, but she didn't have that until last year when she's able to better understand the rules. She's lost it a few times but has earned it back. It was easier for us to give her a tv than to listen to the kids fighting and her going into full blown rage over who watches what. Ya know?</p><p> </p><p>I also use the "bear hug" with- legs and arms around her when she gets violent. That way she can't get near enough to an appendage to bite it. (But that's what WE do. I'll follow smallworld's exampe and not give a recommendation for you to do that.)</p><p> </p><p>And if you want to read on, some suggestions on how we ward off a possible event:</p><p> </p><p>*I have timers that are set so difficult child knows the limits</p><p>*I give many warnings before I act because I know if I don't it means trouble</p><p>*check lists and charts so everything is in writing (chores, to do lists etc)</p><p>*warnings about how much time left before tv goes off so she's forewarned</p><p>*she's old enough now that I can tell her I'll TIVO her show to ward off problems</p><p>*she hasn't had a bedroom door for about 6 years (since she pulled it off the wall)</p><p>*REWARD REWARD REWARD. we've found that she is VERY productive when rewarded or told "good job", "thank you for helping (even when it was minimal)" and "wow"'d at all the artwork and school work she wants to show off.</p><p> </p><p>I certainly understand how much this kind of thing takes out of you. It is very exhausting, kinda like always walking on egg shells!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy423, post: 224123, member: 6118"] Are you in my house? OMG, that's so similar to how difficult child rages here too. We've gotten so much better in the last few years because she's gotten help with- coping skills thru school SW's. She does have a tv in her room, but she didn't have that until last year when she's able to better understand the rules. She's lost it a few times but has earned it back. It was easier for us to give her a tv than to listen to the kids fighting and her going into full blown rage over who watches what. Ya know? I also use the "bear hug" with- legs and arms around her when she gets violent. That way she can't get near enough to an appendage to bite it. (But that's what WE do. I'll follow smallworld's exampe and not give a recommendation for you to do that.) And if you want to read on, some suggestions on how we ward off a possible event: *I have timers that are set so difficult child knows the limits *I give many warnings before I act because I know if I don't it means trouble *check lists and charts so everything is in writing (chores, to do lists etc) *warnings about how much time left before tv goes off so she's forewarned *she's old enough now that I can tell her I'll TIVO her show to ward off problems *she hasn't had a bedroom door for about 6 years (since she pulled it off the wall) *REWARD REWARD REWARD. we've found that she is VERY productive when rewarded or told "good job", "thank you for helping (even when it was minimal)" and "wow"'d at all the artwork and school work she wants to show off. I certainly understand how much this kind of thing takes out of you. It is very exhausting, kinda like always walking on egg shells! [/QUOTE]
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I knew it was bound to happen...(long)
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