I too feel that there are times my help is needed and can't commit to ever kicking my son out. He has never been abusive to us, I'm not saying we haven't had arguments or said things he shouldn't have.
I take it a day at a time and have no hard and fast ultimatums as things have changed quickly and at times we have to backtrack depending on how he is.
He actually just moved out again, and we are all hoping it is a good thing for him. He seems to fall deeper into depression when he lives with us so it's for the best that he doesn't for that reason. We have told both our boys they are always welcome in our home and we would never turn them away. Our youngest moves home in August to attend forestry school for two years.
I don't know if my son is sober or not right now. He did detox a few months ago but he has slipped a few times since. I think his journey is going to be bumpy and I am trying to just be present in the moment and do what's best at that time.
Take care, and I hope for peace for you and your grandson.
