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I made him leave.
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<blockquote data-quote="Ironbutterfly" data-source="post: 677690" data-attributes="member: 19951"><p>COPA, you have to learn to forgive yourself when you have those should have moments. I will share this you. Last summer when Difficult Child got out of fail. I picked him and brought him home with us for 4 days. I told him you have a choice. Go to Salvation Army or Teen Challenge and finish the program. If you do not, I will no longer be your payee. You are free to go back to your town and live your life and figure out the money aspect on your own. Here are organizations there that will be your payee. I love you- but this is all I will do for you. Well- I wanted him to go to my state for Salvation Army vs. back to his town, where all his "druggie friends" were. He begged husband and I to let him go back to his town to Salvation Army because he had his Christian Rocks for support. If he went in my state he would have no support. Hard for them to come visit him, etc. Husband and thought about it over night. Prayed. Made our decision. We allowed him to go back to his town so his Pastors and Christian friends could support him and rally him on. Welllllllllllll. He lasted one day- was back to ole neighborhood and his life was a crap storm again. I cried, beat myself over that decision. I should have never sent him back into the Lions den. For months I carried that burden. </p><p></p><p>Then a friend talked to me- and wised me up. He made his decision to leave the program. He would have left no matter what town, city he went to. He would have found a way. He conned us good- even using the Christian excuse to do it. </p><p></p><p>Fast forward. He left the state 6 months later and is living so much better. He left the Lions den. I am no longer his payee. He is figuring out things for himself. He is happier then I have seen him in years. We talk couple times a week. He is back to reading his bible. He is out of the crazy-ness, at least for now. </p><p></p><p>Let him go and find his own way. Quit second guessing, doing should have's. It will drive you insane, Our decisions and mistakes have a correct of correcting themselves- perhaps by a different fork in the road...but that fork can sometimes get you to that good place, albeit, just with a small detour.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ironbutterfly, post: 677690, member: 19951"] COPA, you have to learn to forgive yourself when you have those should have moments. I will share this you. Last summer when Difficult Child got out of fail. I picked him and brought him home with us for 4 days. I told him you have a choice. Go to Salvation Army or Teen Challenge and finish the program. If you do not, I will no longer be your payee. You are free to go back to your town and live your life and figure out the money aspect on your own. Here are organizations there that will be your payee. I love you- but this is all I will do for you. Well- I wanted him to go to my state for Salvation Army vs. back to his town, where all his "druggie friends" were. He begged husband and I to let him go back to his town to Salvation Army because he had his Christian Rocks for support. If he went in my state he would have no support. Hard for them to come visit him, etc. Husband and thought about it over night. Prayed. Made our decision. We allowed him to go back to his town so his Pastors and Christian friends could support him and rally him on. Welllllllllllll. He lasted one day- was back to ole neighborhood and his life was a crap storm again. I cried, beat myself over that decision. I should have never sent him back into the Lions den. For months I carried that burden. Then a friend talked to me- and wised me up. He made his decision to leave the program. He would have left no matter what town, city he went to. He would have found a way. He conned us good- even using the Christian excuse to do it. Fast forward. He left the state 6 months later and is living so much better. He left the Lions den. I am no longer his payee. He is figuring out things for himself. He is happier then I have seen him in years. We talk couple times a week. He is back to reading his bible. He is out of the crazy-ness, at least for now. Let him go and find his own way. Quit second guessing, doing should have's. It will drive you insane, Our decisions and mistakes have a correct of correcting themselves- perhaps by a different fork in the road...but that fork can sometimes get you to that good place, albeit, just with a small detour. [/QUOTE]
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