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Family of Origin
I miss my sister...for the first time in say 55 years.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 654733" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p></p></blockquote><p></p><p></p><p>Let me try to understand what kinder to myself would mean by identifying how I have condemned and treated myself cruelly today:</p><p></p><p>When I feel vulnerable .... I jump to fearing that the vulnerability will continue the rest of my life.</p><p>When I decide to stop doing something that may be good for me (like walking daily) I fear that I will never do it again.</p><p>I start believing that for the rest of my life I will not be able to this thing, and all other things that I have done easily in the past.</p><p>When I start to organize papers or to pay bills, and begin to feel anxious, I think that the anxiety will continue unless I stop.</p><p>When I stop doing something because of anxiety, I go to bed.</p><p>I then start thinking I will have to stay in bed for the rest of my life.</p><p>I believe the voice that tells me the anxiety will stop if I stop doing chores.</p><p>Frequently I empower some other women to feel they can do things better than can I.</p><p>When I start to clean the kitchen and begin to feel anxiety I tell myself that if I stop cleaning-- the anxiety will stop.</p><p>When I sense that an acquaintance feels uncomfortable with something that transpired between us...I take responsibility for same.</p><p></p><p>Change would mean:</p><p></p><p>When I feel vulnerable....I feel vulnerable. It is a feeling, nothing more, nothing less.he</p><p>When I don't walk (or anything else) for a day or a week. Big Deal.</p><p>The rest of my life is this second. Anything more is a feeling. See Number one.</p><p>Accept that life is change, and change is life. There are many things I cannot do as well. It is no big deal. There are many things that are left to do.</p><p>Have a basket full of things to work on bed, for when I am anxious.</p><p>Have people work with me in the house until I am no longer anxious when I work.</p><p>If I feel I have to subordinate my abilities with a certain person, or take responsibility for their discomfort limit interactions with that person until I better understand the dynamic.</p><p>Identify tasks in the house that are very circumscribed and time limited. Have the expectation that I will complete the task, regardless of the feelings some up.</p><p></p><p>Thank you Cedar.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>.</p><p>[/QUOTE]</p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 654733, member: 18958"] [/QUOTE] Let me try to understand what kinder to myself would mean by identifying how I have condemned and treated myself cruelly today: When I feel vulnerable .... I jump to fearing that the vulnerability will continue the rest of my life. When I decide to stop doing something that may be good for me (like walking daily) I fear that I will never do it again. I start believing that for the rest of my life I will not be able to this thing, and all other things that I have done easily in the past. When I start to organize papers or to pay bills, and begin to feel anxious, I think that the anxiety will continue unless I stop. When I stop doing something because of anxiety, I go to bed. I then start thinking I will have to stay in bed for the rest of my life. I believe the voice that tells me the anxiety will stop if I stop doing chores. Frequently I empower some other women to feel they can do things better than can I. When I start to clean the kitchen and begin to feel anxiety I tell myself that if I stop cleaning-- the anxiety will stop. When I sense that an acquaintance feels uncomfortable with something that transpired between us...I take responsibility for same. Change would mean: When I feel vulnerable....I feel vulnerable. It is a feeling, nothing more, nothing less.he When I don't walk (or anything else) for a day or a week. Big Deal. The rest of my life is this second. Anything more is a feeling. See Number one. Accept that life is change, and change is life. There are many things I cannot do as well. It is no big deal. There are many things that are left to do. Have a basket full of things to work on bed, for when I am anxious. Have people work with me in the house until I am no longer anxious when I work. If I feel I have to subordinate my abilities with a certain person, or take responsibility for their discomfort limit interactions with that person until I better understand the dynamic. Identify tasks in the house that are very circumscribed and time limited. Have the expectation that I will complete the task, regardless of the feelings some up. Thank you Cedar. . [/QUOTE]
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I miss my sister...for the first time in say 55 years.
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