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Substance Abuse
I need a life jacket
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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 548499" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>Hi Pam and welcome. I'm another one that has lived through your nightmare. We kicked out daughter out several times. Let me caution you, though, depending on the state laws of the state you live in, it may not be as easy as calling a 24 hour locksmith. In my state, you cannot simply kick someone out that has established residency. We were told by the police that we would have to go through the eviction process to make our daughter leave even though she didn't pay us rent and had stolen from us. She knew that and had told us that we would have to evict her but we didn't believe it until we heard it from the police ourselves.</p><p></p><p>The next time she stole from us we gave her the choice of leaving immediately or we would prosecute (we had the forged check for proof). She choose to leave and since she had nowhere to go, she agreed to go to rehab. From there she went to a halfway house and was eventually kicked out for drinking. </p><p></p><p>We let her come back home when she agreed to begin a DBT program and get a job. So far she is doing well but I still don't trust her and never leave my purse out of my sight. I don't know whether I will ever get to the point where I can totally trust her again.</p><p></p><p>The others are right that your son has no reason to change as long as he has a roof over his head, food to eat, and money to spend on drugs. I am not a big proponent (anymore . . . my views have changed) of tough love or the sink or swim philosophy but until your son is willing to go to rehab and recognize his substance abuse issues, I don't think you have any choice. </p><p></p><p>Keep posting. We are here for support. It would help us all if you would add a signature to the bottom of your posts like the one you see below. Here is a link to help you learn how to do it: </p><p></p><p><a href="http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/f7/signatures-8399/" target="_blank">http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/f7/signatures-8399/</a></p><p></p><p>~Kathy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 548499, member: 1967"] Hi Pam and welcome. I'm another one that has lived through your nightmare. We kicked out daughter out several times. Let me caution you, though, depending on the state laws of the state you live in, it may not be as easy as calling a 24 hour locksmith. In my state, you cannot simply kick someone out that has established residency. We were told by the police that we would have to go through the eviction process to make our daughter leave even though she didn't pay us rent and had stolen from us. She knew that and had told us that we would have to evict her but we didn't believe it until we heard it from the police ourselves. The next time she stole from us we gave her the choice of leaving immediately or we would prosecute (we had the forged check for proof). She choose to leave and since she had nowhere to go, she agreed to go to rehab. From there she went to a halfway house and was eventually kicked out for drinking. We let her come back home when she agreed to begin a DBT program and get a job. So far she is doing well but I still don't trust her and never leave my purse out of my sight. I don't know whether I will ever get to the point where I can totally trust her again. The others are right that your son has no reason to change as long as he has a roof over his head, food to eat, and money to spend on drugs. I am not a big proponent (anymore . . . my views have changed) of tough love or the sink or swim philosophy but until your son is willing to go to rehab and recognize his substance abuse issues, I don't think you have any choice. Keep posting. We are here for support. It would help us all if you would add a signature to the bottom of your posts like the one you see below. Here is a link to help you learn how to do it: [URL="http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/f7/signatures-8399/"]http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/f7/signatures-8399/[/URL] ~Kathy [/QUOTE]
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