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I need to be tied to the mast.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 740853" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>This was beautifully written Elsi and lovingly wise.</p><p></p><p>Yes. This is it. I have written over and over again that I have had so many losses. I have turned away from family when the pain or humiliation was too great. I just cannot bear another repetition. And yet I know I can. I know I must. </p><p></p><p>It is really about facing life in another way. In understanding the nature of life. That it really is not about happy endings. We can only work to be better people. Better to ourselves. And to others. More conscious. More responsible and available to love and to be love. But we cannot control history. Not our own or anybody else's. </p><p></p><p>I tell myself that my task now in life is to go vertical. To accept myself and my real feelings. To listen to them. To act on them. To live by them. And to understand my life in terms of my own story, and nobody else's.</p><p></p><p>Thank you. This is a process. And I am a work in process. Thank you for being there.</p><p></p><p>I am looking at the clock. The birthday day will be over in almost 4 hours. I am very sad. Thirty is a momentous birthday. And this is sad.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 740853, member: 18958"] This was beautifully written Elsi and lovingly wise. Yes. This is it. I have written over and over again that I have had so many losses. I have turned away from family when the pain or humiliation was too great. I just cannot bear another repetition. And yet I know I can. I know I must. It is really about facing life in another way. In understanding the nature of life. That it really is not about happy endings. We can only work to be better people. Better to ourselves. And to others. More conscious. More responsible and available to love and to be love. But we cannot control history. Not our own or anybody else's. I tell myself that my task now in life is to go vertical. To accept myself and my real feelings. To listen to them. To act on them. To live by them. And to understand my life in terms of my own story, and nobody else's. Thank you. This is a process. And I am a work in process. Thank you for being there. I am looking at the clock. The birthday day will be over in almost 4 hours. I am very sad. Thirty is a momentous birthday. And this is sad. [/QUOTE]
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