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General Parenting
I *really* need some help here
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 265026" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>I agree with SW. And what CM said about breaking the cycle makes sense, too. You aren't doing him any favors by looking the other way. Neither is his mom. What's the point in going through the motions of rules and boundaries if no one is willing to enforce them?</p><p> </p><p>Does he drive? Then take away the keys. If he leaves without permission, report him as a runaway, or violate him if that's the right term. Right now, all he's getting is yada, yada, yada from the adults in his life. No one is backing up the talk with real, concrete consequences.</p><p> </p><p>Why would he have access to his medications to sell, as you're suspecting, especially if they are controlled substances, and especially if his behavior is so out of control? He is not a typical 16yo, and you're giving him the privileges of a typical 16yo. It's too much rope, in my opinion. medications should be administered in your presence and he should prove that he's swallowed and not cheeked them. </p><p> </p><p>If his medications aren't right, then his mom and you, or whomever is taking charge of that needs to push the psychiatrist to get them right. If you don't have that foundation in place, all the other work you're doing with him will be wasted. It'd be like trying to teach a kid to read who badly needs glasses and has none.</p><p> </p><p>I can't imagine being in your shoes, responsible for someone else's difficult child while trying to deal with your own difficult child and health issues. You are a brave and generous person for doing this.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>((((HUGS))))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 265026, member: 3444"] I agree with SW. And what CM said about breaking the cycle makes sense, too. You aren't doing him any favors by looking the other way. Neither is his mom. What's the point in going through the motions of rules and boundaries if no one is willing to enforce them? Does he drive? Then take away the keys. If he leaves without permission, report him as a runaway, or violate him if that's the right term. Right now, all he's getting is yada, yada, yada from the adults in his life. No one is backing up the talk with real, concrete consequences. Why would he have access to his medications to sell, as you're suspecting, especially if they are controlled substances, and especially if his behavior is so out of control? He is not a typical 16yo, and you're giving him the privileges of a typical 16yo. It's too much rope, in my opinion. medications should be administered in your presence and he should prove that he's swallowed and not cheeked them. If his medications aren't right, then his mom and you, or whomever is taking charge of that needs to push the psychiatrist to get them right. If you don't have that foundation in place, all the other work you're doing with him will be wasted. It'd be like trying to teach a kid to read who badly needs glasses and has none. I can't imagine being in your shoes, responsible for someone else's difficult child while trying to deal with your own difficult child and health issues. You are a brave and generous person for doing this. ((((HUGS)))) [/QUOTE]
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