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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 503518" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>This may sound strange, so bear with me.</p><p></p><p>LOTS of the time we use tone of voice to convey a message. It can be super handy and it also can cause problems. I have a sib who has always "known" what everyone else was thinking/feeling/meaning and more than 90% of the time he is so far from correct it would be laughable if it didn't cause so many problems. Mostly because he often has figured out what you "feel" or "think" about something LOOOOOOOOOOOONG before you are even aware that something exists. </p><p></p><p>One of the few things that helped was just saying what we meant. Instead of "Eloise Grizelda Grinchensten!" we would say "STOP NOW Eloise" or "You are in BIG trouble, Eloise Grizelda Grinchenstein!" </p><p></p><p>We stopped relying on tone of voice and came out as just said "you are driving me batguano crazy" or "Have you lost your mind? Dad is going to stick his fork through your hand if you get any closer to his pie. Being his child will NOT stop him!"</p><p></p><p>You can also mirror some of his tone back to him. This would best be at a calm, teachable moment. Maybe say "the other day when you said "Blah blah blah" the way you said seemed like you were angry with me. It sounded like this to me, "blah blah blah" (said in his tone of voice). When I say it the way you did, what do you think I mean besides the words?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 503518, member: 1233"] This may sound strange, so bear with me. LOTS of the time we use tone of voice to convey a message. It can be super handy and it also can cause problems. I have a sib who has always "known" what everyone else was thinking/feeling/meaning and more than 90% of the time he is so far from correct it would be laughable if it didn't cause so many problems. Mostly because he often has figured out what you "feel" or "think" about something LOOOOOOOOOOOONG before you are even aware that something exists. One of the few things that helped was just saying what we meant. Instead of "Eloise Grizelda Grinchensten!" we would say "STOP NOW Eloise" or "You are in BIG trouble, Eloise Grizelda Grinchenstein!" We stopped relying on tone of voice and came out as just said "you are driving me batguano crazy" or "Have you lost your mind? Dad is going to stick his fork through your hand if you get any closer to his pie. Being his child will NOT stop him!" You can also mirror some of his tone back to him. This would best be at a calm, teachable moment. Maybe say "the other day when you said "Blah blah blah" the way you said seemed like you were angry with me. It sounded like this to me, "blah blah blah" (said in his tone of voice). When I say it the way you did, what do you think I mean besides the words? [/QUOTE]
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