And...I'm through it!
Awakened this morning feeling more like myself than I have since beginning this exploration of the underpinnings of self.
Dream: I have taken my son (pre-teen) to the doctor. It is an old-style doctor's office/hospital with a Norman Rockwell feeling to it. A sports physical for him or some good thing like that.
It was like going to the doctor in Mayberry, with Andy and Aunt Bee and Barney Fife somewhere around and going about their business. That normal and good a thing to do.
As we are leaving, one of the two male doctors there hugs me for the longest time. It is exactly what I need, and feels just right. There is a sense of regret at all that might have been as I draw away. I feel valued; validated. There is a sense that I am very special; that this was not expected and has gone unrecognized; that I have done well.
It makes me sad for the son I once had; it has been a very hard thing, to lose him, to have lost everything he represented. On the other hand, I have been blessed with so much, in having had that to believe in.
I awakened thinking about that dream, and with the distinct feeling that something is over, that a noisy, chaotic time is coming ~ things with which I am unfamiliar. Things like those party favors where you blow into them and something rolls outand confetti and a parade and balloons.
I am happy.
Cedar
So, I think the doctor may have been my father.
Again, the feeling is cherished, is of having exceeded expectation altogether.
Like American Pharoah.
