You have come so far, hearthope.
Little by little, because you are changing, other things will begin to change now, too.
Don't beat yourself up for anything that doesn't go the way you think it will or "should". There are no shoulds, here. We all want the same thing: our children meeting their potentials and taking advantage of the things we have worked so hard to give them.
That is the ultimate goal.
To give our children a better life, a better start, than the one so many of us had.
It is drug use that is interfering with that ~ nothing you did wrong, nothing difficult child did wrong either, really.
So, here's the thing.
difficult child is putting you all through this so he can get a little high off cocaine (or whatever).
Probably because he isn't thinking straight, difficult child has decided the pain he is causing his family ~ and I don't mean just how difficult he is to live with, I mean the willful betrayal of every dream you had for him ~ is worth it.
So in a way, however you decide to handle this, that is the question being decided, here.
Whether the high is worth the destruction of the dream and the betrayal of the family.
And if I knew then what I know now, that is just how I would have approached the issue when it was my difficult child engaging in those behaviors.
Because when you look at it that way?
Everything gets really clear and still, and you will know just what to say, and just how to handle whatever is coming next.
Barbara
