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<blockquote data-quote="mom_to_3" data-source="post: 154458" data-attributes="member: 30"><p>I'm really beginning to get frustrated here! I just typed out a nice long reply, only to have it disappear! This isn't the first time, I wonder what in the world is causing that? Okay, I'll start again. </p><p></p><p>If I sounded mean hearted in my earlier post, I'm sorry, not my intention at all. I notice that the other replies focused more on you protecting Nicole against abuse. If I was aware of my girls being abused, I would turn into a HUGE momma bear! The problem that I see here is that, you have already talked to both participants and they BOTH continue the same actions with you in the middle of it. That is why I was "harsher" in my response. Nicole willingly walks into that situation. She takes her child into that situation. She doesn't HAVE to go to boyfriend house and stay there, she chooses to. WHY? Yes, they have a child together and it's in the best interest of the child to see both of her parents. That doesn't mean that Nicole has to be there and set herself up to be mistreated.</p><p></p><p>Nicole needs to learn some "big girl" lessons, yesterday. Not only for herself, but for her daughter. She's teaching her daughter life lessons right now through her actions. She's teaching her daughter to be a weak person, to purposely put herself in harms way and how not to respect herself. It would be one thing if Nicole was married to or living with boyfriend and had no other choice but to be there. In that instance I would fight tooth and nail to protect her. Nicole is not "stuck". <strong>She willing walks into that mess</strong>. I think you have talked and talked and talked to her, correct? That is why I suggested ultimatums. </p><p></p><p>My favorite line in life is <strong>"you teach people how to treat you".</strong> It is so true! We each teach others just by our demeanors, if we can be spoken to a certain way, we teach by our reaction, if someone can repeatedly treat us badly, and we allow that, we teach them that we think so little of ourselves that we'll come back for MORE bad treatment. We must respect ourselves before anyone else will respect us. I teach these words to my daughters when the opportunity arises. I imagine I would teach my son's the same "truths" if I had son's as these are words for everyone to live by. I know you are upset and I am sorry for that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mom_to_3, post: 154458, member: 30"] I'm really beginning to get frustrated here! I just typed out a nice long reply, only to have it disappear! This isn't the first time, I wonder what in the world is causing that? Okay, I'll start again. If I sounded mean hearted in my earlier post, I'm sorry, not my intention at all. I notice that the other replies focused more on you protecting Nicole against abuse. If I was aware of my girls being abused, I would turn into a HUGE momma bear! The problem that I see here is that, you have already talked to both participants and they BOTH continue the same actions with you in the middle of it. That is why I was "harsher" in my response. Nicole willingly walks into that situation. She takes her child into that situation. She doesn't HAVE to go to boyfriend house and stay there, she chooses to. WHY? Yes, they have a child together and it's in the best interest of the child to see both of her parents. That doesn't mean that Nicole has to be there and set herself up to be mistreated. Nicole needs to learn some "big girl" lessons, yesterday. Not only for herself, but for her daughter. She's teaching her daughter life lessons right now through her actions. She's teaching her daughter to be a weak person, to purposely put herself in harms way and how not to respect herself. It would be one thing if Nicole was married to or living with boyfriend and had no other choice but to be there. In that instance I would fight tooth and nail to protect her. Nicole is not "stuck". [B]She willing walks into that mess[/B]. I think you have talked and talked and talked to her, correct? That is why I suggested ultimatums. My favorite line in life is [B]"you teach people how to treat you".[/B] It is so true! We each teach others just by our demeanors, if we can be spoken to a certain way, we teach by our reaction, if someone can repeatedly treat us badly, and we allow that, we teach them that we think so little of ourselves that we'll come back for MORE bad treatment. We must respect ourselves before anyone else will respect us. I teach these words to my daughters when the opportunity arises. I imagine I would teach my son's the same "truths" if I had son's as these are words for everyone to live by. I know you are upset and I am sorry for that. [/QUOTE]
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