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I'm new, scared, and sad.
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<blockquote data-quote="ABCDEFG" data-source="post: 399471"><p>Hi. I'm really glad I found this site.</p><p> </p><p>My son is 13 and has been at a Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) for 5 months now. We are in California. At times I think he's getting better, and at other times I see he's really not. A few key points:</p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">He has an IQ of 80, for what it's worth</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">He has been stealing since he was about 5, and it is continuing to happen. He steals from family, friends, whoever he can. He does not admit this behavior.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">He has recently been in juvenile hall twice as a result of assult and property destruction at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and is on informal probation</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Recently, he began acting out sexually. He says and does inappropriate things at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC). A few weeks ago he took a younger child's hand and put it on his clothed private area. He has humped things, etc. This is newer behavior</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">He is WAY behind academically. He doesn't know basic things. I hate to admit this, but I feel embarrassed about this aspect of it in particular. He does not have the general world knowledge that an average 9 year old has, let alone 13 year old</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">He was home with me a few times over the holidays and was, for the most part, an angel and a doll</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">I have a 7 year old daughter who loves him but is scared of him</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">He has had no father figure, and has in fact been abandoned a few times by different men</li> </ul><p>In California, laws are limited as far as what they can and can't do. For example, he has been hiding stolen electronics in his crotch area in order to get to and from school with it (on the same premises) and they are unable to search him physically. They aren't able to put hands on him at all, in fact. </p><p> </p><p>They are considering a more restrictive placement, which might be out of state, as this is not helping. I'm so scared. I don't want him to go out of state. Truth be told, I don't know if it would even help him. I'm not sure that he can be helped.</p><p></p><p>Can anyone share any feedback with me? It hurts me to my core to see my son in pain, and to know the possible outcome of his life. I would do anything to help him. Even thinking in the short term about all the pain ahead is so upsetting. Thanks in advance.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ABCDEFG, post: 399471"] Hi. I'm really glad I found this site. My son is 13 and has been at a Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) for 5 months now. We are in California. At times I think he's getting better, and at other times I see he's really not. A few key points: [LIST] [*]He has an IQ of 80, for what it's worth [*]He has been stealing since he was about 5, and it is continuing to happen. He steals from family, friends, whoever he can. He does not admit this behavior. [*]He has recently been in juvenile hall twice as a result of assult and property destruction at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and is on informal probation [*]Recently, he began acting out sexually. He says and does inappropriate things at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC). A few weeks ago he took a younger child's hand and put it on his clothed private area. He has humped things, etc. This is newer behavior [*]He is WAY behind academically. He doesn't know basic things. I hate to admit this, but I feel embarrassed about this aspect of it in particular. He does not have the general world knowledge that an average 9 year old has, let alone 13 year old [*]He was home with me a few times over the holidays and was, for the most part, an angel and a doll [*]I have a 7 year old daughter who loves him but is scared of him [*]He has had no father figure, and has in fact been abandoned a few times by different men [/LIST]In California, laws are limited as far as what they can and can't do. For example, he has been hiding stolen electronics in his crotch area in order to get to and from school with it (on the same premises) and they are unable to search him physically. They aren't able to put hands on him at all, in fact. They are considering a more restrictive placement, which might be out of state, as this is not helping. I'm so scared. I don't want him to go out of state. Truth be told, I don't know if it would even help him. I'm not sure that he can be helped. Can anyone share any feedback with me? It hurts me to my core to see my son in pain, and to know the possible outcome of his life. I would do anything to help him. Even thinking in the short term about all the pain ahead is so upsetting. Thanks in advance. [/QUOTE]
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