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I'm so discouraged...
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 305592" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>OK, Trish, here's a few suggested additions:</p><p></p><p>1) His rent is a lot less than it would be outside. The lowered rent is because he will be doing some chores in lieu of the extra rent. In other words - he IS getting paid to do the chores. Because if HE doesn't do them, you have to pay someone else to do them and it gets added on to his rent.</p><p></p><p>2) Take him to a financial adviser at the bank. Make a special appointment for this. Prime the financial adviser ahead of time if you can, you want things explained as to a little child, with charts, etc. What you want - for the financial adviser to explain to DS19 just why investing is a good thing because he will get more money in the long run. Money in your pocket gets spent. He can still have enough to get by on, but having too much money in his pocket - that money is not working for him in his pocket; in fact it risks getting lost or wasted. Tell him that he can always re-negotiate the amounts, if he feels it's not working. But he has to give it a fair trial.</p><p>The thing with most good, high-interest investment accounts - they pay a higher rate of interest if you pay money in and don't withdraw any, each month. If the financial adviser works the figures for him and shows him how much money he can have in, say, six months of paying in $50 a month vs having $50 a month extra in his wallet - that might do the trick. It did with difficult child 1.</p><p></p><p>Your aim is to reduce his ready cash. The reason being, too much ready cash makes it too possible for him to splurge on drugs etc and to NOT learn how to manage his money. He needs to learn to make choices. Too much money = no need to choose, he can always buy both.</p><p></p><p>As for him learning to do "women's work" - he's not gay, is he? Because if he ever expects to have a long-term loving relationship with a woman, he needs to learn that the best foreplay is taking out the garbage and hanging up the washing!</p><p></p><p>("women's work", indeed...)</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 305592, member: 1991"] OK, Trish, here's a few suggested additions: 1) His rent is a lot less than it would be outside. The lowered rent is because he will be doing some chores in lieu of the extra rent. In other words - he IS getting paid to do the chores. Because if HE doesn't do them, you have to pay someone else to do them and it gets added on to his rent. 2) Take him to a financial adviser at the bank. Make a special appointment for this. Prime the financial adviser ahead of time if you can, you want things explained as to a little child, with charts, etc. What you want - for the financial adviser to explain to DS19 just why investing is a good thing because he will get more money in the long run. Money in your pocket gets spent. He can still have enough to get by on, but having too much money in his pocket - that money is not working for him in his pocket; in fact it risks getting lost or wasted. Tell him that he can always re-negotiate the amounts, if he feels it's not working. But he has to give it a fair trial. The thing with most good, high-interest investment accounts - they pay a higher rate of interest if you pay money in and don't withdraw any, each month. If the financial adviser works the figures for him and shows him how much money he can have in, say, six months of paying in $50 a month vs having $50 a month extra in his wallet - that might do the trick. It did with difficult child 1. Your aim is to reduce his ready cash. The reason being, too much ready cash makes it too possible for him to splurge on drugs etc and to NOT learn how to manage his money. He needs to learn to make choices. Too much money = no need to choose, he can always buy both. As for him learning to do "women's work" - he's not gay, is he? Because if he ever expects to have a long-term loving relationship with a woman, he needs to learn that the best foreplay is taking out the garbage and hanging up the washing! ("women's work", indeed...) Marg [/QUOTE]
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