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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 462599" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Hello and welcome. Thanks for telling us about your son. Well, while pointing out that I am in a different cultural context, from what you say I quite agree with you - why on earth is he being sent to the principal all the time, if they say they understand there may be psychological issues? Sounds very push-you/pull-me to me... I think the message being given to your son is a negative and potentially damaging one because if he does indeed suffer with ADHD and ODD, he cannot "help" much of the behaviour that he is being punished for. Can you go talk to the principal directly? As for rewards and punishment - my son also has some version of ADHD/ODD and punishing him has never had any effect except making him depressed and hostile. Rewards do seem to work, on the other hand. If you can't use that to any effect, what is left? Talking, I think, explaining - and negotiating. I have often been surprised at how my son responds well to be being told things, explained things respectfully. </p><p>I do hope you and the school begin to get a handle on what is going on, and some intelligent, workable solutions. Warm wishes.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 462599, member: 11227"] Hello and welcome. Thanks for telling us about your son. Well, while pointing out that I am in a different cultural context, from what you say I quite agree with you - why on earth is he being sent to the principal all the time, if they say they understand there may be psychological issues? Sounds very push-you/pull-me to me... I think the message being given to your son is a negative and potentially damaging one because if he does indeed suffer with ADHD and ODD, he cannot "help" much of the behaviour that he is being punished for. Can you go talk to the principal directly? As for rewards and punishment - my son also has some version of ADHD/ODD and punishing him has never had any effect except making him depressed and hostile. Rewards do seem to work, on the other hand. If you can't use that to any effect, what is left? Talking, I think, explaining - and negotiating. I have often been surprised at how my son responds well to be being told things, explained things respectfully. I do hope you and the school begin to get a handle on what is going on, and some intelligent, workable solutions. Warm wishes. [/QUOTE]
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