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Imminently homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 325050" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Katya, </p><p></p><p>First of all........HUGE HUGE BIG TIME GIRLFRIEND COME HERE AND I'll make you a lovely cup of super duper cocoa with whipped cream and sprinkles and we'll sit, chat and talk of the cats first. What kind do you breed? I would like to know about the Kitteh's. lol. I'm literally done talking about the kiddehs. </p><p></p><p>But you just can't stop like that can ya? (Sigh and great big exhale) Who am I to say anything lol? I lost my mudslide this morning so bad MYconversation to my son started off with Frogs Uncle....and went blasting from there. lol. Sometimes I'm able to hold it together for a lot longer, but this child pushes all the buttons on the elevator at once and I need to get to the penthouse in a hurry. Know what I mean?? </p><p></p><p>I think it used to be easy for me to sit here and say -"DO NOT LET HIM COME HOME." All our shelters have closed here. Our Salvation Army is on the verge of closing too. The homeless rate has tripled and the soup kitchens have lines so long that on Thanksgiving it took three hours in line to get a free meal. It's never been this bad. Then you have to consider, if I take him in my home again; how bad will it be for us? </p><p></p><p>The reality of that you already know. The problem is what are you able to handle and what won't you handle? For us? I had a list of homeless shelters for Dude and when I found that they'd been closed? I started crossing the places off and when there were none? It was going to be the park. Okay well, whose fault was that? Not mine. Dudes. Should he go there? I guess he could. Had he even tried to help himself? Yes. Was he getting the support he needed to do better at the foster home? No. If we bring him back into our home could he succeed? Maybe. Would it be difficult? Absolutely. Would he help us? Probably not. Can we deal with that? We've been dealing with it, what is the difference? And on and on went our list of could we do this????? </p><p></p><p>When it got down to it? I said - Park, DF said - One more try. (amazing huh?) Dude actually said "Send me to my biodads." Not an option as far as I'm concerned. He went anyway. Life's not so great there. So now what? Back home huh? Great. </p><p></p><p>My life has changed with Dude there. It's gone from a series of peaceful do what I wants - to Locked doors, redirects (repeat that 1000 times a day), staying on top of him when he's there and watching him all the time. And ulcer medication. Our goal was to help him obtain a job by the end of the year, save his money, get a car, pay his fines, and get out on his own hopefully by Spring. The way the economy is? It's hard to tell what will be for any of us. Living here? The park was the only option for Dude. SSI turned him down twice. </p><p></p><p>If you can get SSI for your son? Go for it. Let him be independent. If Dude had gotten SSI? He wouldn't be living here. </p><p></p><p>I'm sorry you have to face this....but just know you aren't alone. Sending you tons of strength....I know that you have done all that you could and then some.....and then some more......and then some after that. You're a great Mom. Just because your kid can't get HIS act together doesn't mean you aren't a good Mom. That's hard to learn but true. </p><p></p><p>Hugs & cocoa</p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 325050, member: 4964"] Katya, First of all........HUGE HUGE BIG TIME GIRLFRIEND COME HERE AND I'll make you a lovely cup of super duper cocoa with whipped cream and sprinkles and we'll sit, chat and talk of the cats first. What kind do you breed? I would like to know about the Kitteh's. lol. I'm literally done talking about the kiddehs. But you just can't stop like that can ya? (Sigh and great big exhale) Who am I to say anything lol? I lost my mudslide this morning so bad MYconversation to my son started off with Frogs Uncle....and went blasting from there. lol. Sometimes I'm able to hold it together for a lot longer, but this child pushes all the buttons on the elevator at once and I need to get to the penthouse in a hurry. Know what I mean?? I think it used to be easy for me to sit here and say -"DO NOT LET HIM COME HOME." All our shelters have closed here. Our Salvation Army is on the verge of closing too. The homeless rate has tripled and the soup kitchens have lines so long that on Thanksgiving it took three hours in line to get a free meal. It's never been this bad. Then you have to consider, if I take him in my home again; how bad will it be for us? The reality of that you already know. The problem is what are you able to handle and what won't you handle? For us? I had a list of homeless shelters for Dude and when I found that they'd been closed? I started crossing the places off and when there were none? It was going to be the park. Okay well, whose fault was that? Not mine. Dudes. Should he go there? I guess he could. Had he even tried to help himself? Yes. Was he getting the support he needed to do better at the foster home? No. If we bring him back into our home could he succeed? Maybe. Would it be difficult? Absolutely. Would he help us? Probably not. Can we deal with that? We've been dealing with it, what is the difference? And on and on went our list of could we do this????? When it got down to it? I said - Park, DF said - One more try. (amazing huh?) Dude actually said "Send me to my biodads." Not an option as far as I'm concerned. He went anyway. Life's not so great there. So now what? Back home huh? Great. My life has changed with Dude there. It's gone from a series of peaceful do what I wants - to Locked doors, redirects (repeat that 1000 times a day), staying on top of him when he's there and watching him all the time. And ulcer medication. Our goal was to help him obtain a job by the end of the year, save his money, get a car, pay his fines, and get out on his own hopefully by Spring. The way the economy is? It's hard to tell what will be for any of us. Living here? The park was the only option for Dude. SSI turned him down twice. If you can get SSI for your son? Go for it. Let him be independent. If Dude had gotten SSI? He wouldn't be living here. I'm sorry you have to face this....but just know you aren't alone. Sending you tons of strength....I know that you have done all that you could and then some.....and then some more......and then some after that. You're a great Mom. Just because your kid can't get HIS act together doesn't mean you aren't a good Mom. That's hard to learn but true. Hugs & cocoa Star [/QUOTE]
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