Pigless, our son is "basically a good man". It doesn't change what he's currently choosing to show the world. Any man with any sense of responsibility wouldn't quit a job without another to go to. Before I left the maximum security institution I was working at, I was SOOOOOO stressed out. I was ready to snap out. The job was killing me. But I stayed. Because I Needed It! End of discussion on that. You don't leave a job without another to go to.
Having a relationship with step children, and I truly hate using the term "step", is always difficult. I can assure you that I've had serious issues with our son, but you try to work through it. You don't care for one but not the other. Whether biological or step children, love is unconditional. Like we tell our son, especially when he is being a real douche, is "We will Always love you, we just really don't like you right now." Granted, it tends to piss him off but hey, perks of parenting an adult child!!! LOL!
As far as the farm goes, prioritize. If you really want to keep it, find a way. If you have to move there to do so, the kids will have to deal. It's part of life after all. Sorry you had to go through this but hopefully its for the best.
