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Interesting article: Rigid parenting CAUSES sex in teens!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 230186" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>The thing that has me stuck is that we can encourage kids to wait until 21 and committed all we want. Even good kids are having sex much sooner than that and I at least want my daughter to know about birth control and STDs and how to prevent pregnancies. She isn't a really overly impulsive girl, and that's a plus, but she's very social and well-built unfortunately and I want to tell her things that are realistic. I read "Queen Bees and Wannabes" an absolute GREAT read for moms of teen girls, and the book told the truth. We can and should talk to our kids and keep the communication open. BUT...if they really want to have sex, drink or do drugs, they will. My oldest daughter did, and we tried everything, even homeschooling, and we couldn't stop her. So, with that in mind, knowing that the decision is really up to the teen, I am deciding how to talk to my second daughter (this child who is the one who is closest to me in every way). And I'm picking up a lot of good hints on the internet and in books too. Fortunately, I have been able to give this child and my Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son what I couldn't give my other three kids--total stability in a two parent home where Mom stays home. That was certainly not the case with my oldest three kids and my daughter got it the worst--she was 9 when I divorced her father and 12 I remarried and moved out of state. I feel like the drug use was a lot the fault of my own choices that she had no control over. And I talk about it to her a lot. She wasn't one of those "I don't give a darn" kids who just didn't care about anyone or anything. She was hurting, and I feel guilty. I don't want to do anything wrong to this daughter. And, of course, ditto for my Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son. Both of these kids seem a lot happier than my older three. I'm trying hard to stay on track so that I do the right things at least for these two children...rambling, I know. Maybe somebody knows what I mean...I want these two children to have fond memories of their childhoods. I don't want my maturing daughter to be pushed too fast just because she looks older. If Marg is around...lol...she saw a pix of daughter and knows that she looks quite mature for her age. The interest she gets from boys worries me, although she hasn't done anything wrong (again, don't ask how I know, I do know.) I want to keep her young and don't want her jumping in to things that make one no longer really a child...I don't have these issues with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son. He is progressing and happy, but not at risk for any risky behaviors.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 230186, member: 1550"] The thing that has me stuck is that we can encourage kids to wait until 21 and committed all we want. Even good kids are having sex much sooner than that and I at least want my daughter to know about birth control and STDs and how to prevent pregnancies. She isn't a really overly impulsive girl, and that's a plus, but she's very social and well-built unfortunately and I want to tell her things that are realistic. I read "Queen Bees and Wannabes" an absolute GREAT read for moms of teen girls, and the book told the truth. We can and should talk to our kids and keep the communication open. BUT...if they really want to have sex, drink or do drugs, they will. My oldest daughter did, and we tried everything, even homeschooling, and we couldn't stop her. So, with that in mind, knowing that the decision is really up to the teen, I am deciding how to talk to my second daughter (this child who is the one who is closest to me in every way). And I'm picking up a lot of good hints on the internet and in books too. Fortunately, I have been able to give this child and my Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son what I couldn't give my other three kids--total stability in a two parent home where Mom stays home. That was certainly not the case with my oldest three kids and my daughter got it the worst--she was 9 when I divorced her father and 12 I remarried and moved out of state. I feel like the drug use was a lot the fault of my own choices that she had no control over. And I talk about it to her a lot. She wasn't one of those "I don't give a darn" kids who just didn't care about anyone or anything. She was hurting, and I feel guilty. I don't want to do anything wrong to this daughter. And, of course, ditto for my Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son. Both of these kids seem a lot happier than my older three. I'm trying hard to stay on track so that I do the right things at least for these two children...rambling, I know. Maybe somebody knows what I mean...I want these two children to have fond memories of their childhoods. I don't want my maturing daughter to be pushed too fast just because she looks older. If Marg is around...lol...she saw a pix of daughter and knows that she looks quite mature for her age. The interest she gets from boys worries me, although she hasn't done anything wrong (again, don't ask how I know, I do know.) I want to keep her young and don't want her jumping in to things that make one no longer really a child...I don't have these issues with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son. He is progressing and happy, but not at risk for any risky behaviors. [/QUOTE]
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Interesting article: Rigid parenting CAUSES sex in teens!
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