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Interesting article: Rigid parenting CAUSES sex in teens!
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 230314" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Fran we had much the same experience growing up, I think we had pretty much the same father. While I never did anything to prove I was irresponsible, I still never got the freedom of choice and couldn't wait to move out. On the other hand, I have tried very hard to give both my girls the freedom to be teens. My easy child still holds the values we tried to instill in her and I know she will always live her life that way. She has always made good choices with her life and therefore has all the freedom she could want.</p><p></p><p>difficult child has proven time and time again that she cannot be trusted and that she will make the choices that feel good at the time, not ones that will help her grow into a confident, successful woman. Yesterday she asked to go snowboarding with a certain boy. I immediately said no and then had to backtrack because there was no good reason to say no. After clearing that he would pick her up because she still has no driving privileges other than work or school, and making her take her money out of the bank to pay for it, she asked why I was so hesitant at first and what did I think this boy was going to do. I had to explain it had nothing to do with the boy, that she has lied so many times about where she was and what she was doing that we are always suspect and that was her choice by her behavior. I told her I wished I could trust her and not second guess everything she did. I am doing to her what my parents did to me and I'm not happy about it. But she has done nothing to gain my trust or prove she can make good choices and that is the difference.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 230314, member: 59"] Fran we had much the same experience growing up, I think we had pretty much the same father. While I never did anything to prove I was irresponsible, I still never got the freedom of choice and couldn't wait to move out. On the other hand, I have tried very hard to give both my girls the freedom to be teens. My easy child still holds the values we tried to instill in her and I know she will always live her life that way. She has always made good choices with her life and therefore has all the freedom she could want. difficult child has proven time and time again that she cannot be trusted and that she will make the choices that feel good at the time, not ones that will help her grow into a confident, successful woman. Yesterday she asked to go snowboarding with a certain boy. I immediately said no and then had to backtrack because there was no good reason to say no. After clearing that he would pick her up because she still has no driving privileges other than work or school, and making her take her money out of the bank to pay for it, she asked why I was so hesitant at first and what did I think this boy was going to do. I had to explain it had nothing to do with the boy, that she has lied so many times about where she was and what she was doing that we are always suspect and that was her choice by her behavior. I told her I wished I could trust her and not second guess everything she did. I am doing to her what my parents did to me and I'm not happy about it. But she has done nothing to gain my trust or prove she can make good choices and that is the difference. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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Interesting article: Rigid parenting CAUSES sex in teens!
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