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Intro and a cry for help
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 120323" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Carrie, rewards do generally work much better than punishments. I also think that because of her poor organisation skills, she may be less in control of bringing the work home, than you are aware. I went through this with difficult child 1 - a seemingly very bright lad, but who couldn't organise a chook raffle in a pub. Couldn't navigate his way out of a wet paper bag. </p><p></p><p>You are lucky - teacher is working with you. We didn't have that, it was a disaster. When they finally (belatedly) decided to help with his organisation skills, the school STILL didn't get it, except for one teacher. When I pulled him out of mainstream into a state-based correspondence school (where all the work was in writing and posted to our home) he got all his work done, easily.</p><p></p><p>I also think the punishment-reward system you have set up is too complex. You may need to have it based purely on positive reinforcement, not have any punishments in it until you are SAURE she is capable of organising things well enough to be responsible for herself. Don't base this on age, because for difficult children it's age-independent.</p><p></p><p>Having a study buddy helps - some other student who also has a copy of the same homework, that she can telephone and get the details over the phone. Or getting the teacher to fax a copy home, or email a copy.</p><p></p><p>There are too many aims here - </p><p></p><p>1) to teach her how to organise herself and her time</p><p></p><p>2) To learn to be responsible for herself and her academic output</p><p></p><p>3) To learn how to work independently; and</p><p></p><p>4) To learn the curriculum material.</p><p></p><p>Frankly, she should only be dealing with (4), with the problems you describe. The rest of it - throw it out. Find ways to bypass it for now. Pick it up later on. If she manages to bring home her own copies of the work assigned, reward her. If she doesn't and you have to rely on faxed copies, do not punish but just move on.</p><p></p><p>And as Sharon said, find out why this is a problem. There is more to this than meets the eye.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 120323, member: 1991"] Carrie, rewards do generally work much better than punishments. I also think that because of her poor organisation skills, she may be less in control of bringing the work home, than you are aware. I went through this with difficult child 1 - a seemingly very bright lad, but who couldn't organise a chook raffle in a pub. Couldn't navigate his way out of a wet paper bag. You are lucky - teacher is working with you. We didn't have that, it was a disaster. When they finally (belatedly) decided to help with his organisation skills, the school STILL didn't get it, except for one teacher. When I pulled him out of mainstream into a state-based correspondence school (where all the work was in writing and posted to our home) he got all his work done, easily. I also think the punishment-reward system you have set up is too complex. You may need to have it based purely on positive reinforcement, not have any punishments in it until you are SAURE she is capable of organising things well enough to be responsible for herself. Don't base this on age, because for difficult children it's age-independent. Having a study buddy helps - some other student who also has a copy of the same homework, that she can telephone and get the details over the phone. Or getting the teacher to fax a copy home, or email a copy. There are too many aims here - 1) to teach her how to organise herself and her time 2) To learn to be responsible for herself and her academic output 3) To learn how to work independently; and 4) To learn the curriculum material. Frankly, she should only be dealing with (4), with the problems you describe. The rest of it - throw it out. Find ways to bypass it for now. Pick it up later on. If she manages to bring home her own copies of the work assigned, reward her. If she doesn't and you have to rely on faxed copies, do not punish but just move on. And as Sharon said, find out why this is a problem. There is more to this than meets the eye. Marg [/QUOTE]
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