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Substance Abuse
Intro and looking for words of strength
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<blockquote data-quote="Albatross" data-source="post: 622589" data-attributes="member: 17720"><p>LR, so sorry you are going through this. I have had difficult child move home several times, always with clear rules agreed upon beforehand. The last time, after the rules were broken several times and we got arguments about him not understanding the parameters, we wrote everything down and had him sign it. He was "busted" for the last time on a Wednesday night and we told him to be out Friday morning, so he could make some arrangements. But we weren't really anticipating any violence or theft, etc. I don't know what your situation is. The night before he left, I left a piece of paper with numbers/addresses for homeless shelters, soup kitchen, rehab, etc. (That was a very surreal moment for me, gathering all those numbers.) I didn't get his key or call the police, though I did change the locks after he left. </p><p></p><p>Not to be a cynic, but it seems like difficult children have plenty of places to go/couches to crash on when they have been kicked out of their parents' houses. They aren't necessarily places we would LIKE them to be, but that is what they have chosen, and you just hope they will look around and see their future and decide to change it.</p><p></p><p>As hard as it was to tell him to leave, in my experience it was the only way to start to get any sanity back. It's bad enough to watch them self-destruct, you don't need to be sitting in the front row or handing them props while they do it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Albatross, post: 622589, member: 17720"] LR, so sorry you are going through this. I have had difficult child move home several times, always with clear rules agreed upon beforehand. The last time, after the rules were broken several times and we got arguments about him not understanding the parameters, we wrote everything down and had him sign it. He was "busted" for the last time on a Wednesday night and we told him to be out Friday morning, so he could make some arrangements. But we weren't really anticipating any violence or theft, etc. I don't know what your situation is. The night before he left, I left a piece of paper with numbers/addresses for homeless shelters, soup kitchen, rehab, etc. (That was a very surreal moment for me, gathering all those numbers.) I didn't get his key or call the police, though I did change the locks after he left. Not to be a cynic, but it seems like difficult children have plenty of places to go/couches to crash on when they have been kicked out of their parents' houses. They aren't necessarily places we would LIKE them to be, but that is what they have chosen, and you just hope they will look around and see their future and decide to change it. As hard as it was to tell him to leave, in my experience it was the only way to start to get any sanity back. It's bad enough to watch them self-destruct, you don't need to be sitting in the front row or handing them props while they do it. [/QUOTE]
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