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Intro Post, Question about Swearing in School
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 392641" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Hi and Welcome!!! Don't worry about the time you lurked - we understand that people speak up here when they are ready, and IF they are ready, and often need time to get to that point. I am just glad you finally spoke out - we can always enjoy another member.</p><p> </p><p>You asked if it was okay that school problems were handled at school and not at home. I think it is perfectly fine. Talking to your child about school, encouraging him to do his best, letting him know that you expect him to behave well at school is enough. He does NOT need to be punished at home for transgressions at school. My parents firmly believed that if we got into trouble in school we should get double punishment at home - twice as long or whatever. Reality was that it ruined a LOT of the little time my brother had at home, at least through 10th grade. My husband was fine with that idea, but we quickly learned that it would mean that just about every waking moment our oldest would be in trouble. It is no way to live. </p><p> </p><p>We learned that if we were to have ANY quality family time we needed to let the school handle school problems during school hours. If needed we would go to the school to help handle things, but school problems would NOT come hom. Period. Many other parents have also done this, simply because it was the ONLY way to let their child have anything positive in his life. </p><p> </p><p>Moving your son's medication time may be helpful, it is at least worth trying. Most kids have some type of trouble in the unstructured parts of the day, at least they do at some point. It is hard to figure out the social rules, and what is and isn't okay, during time when you are all together with little direction. Can you think back to recess when you were a kid? In the school I went to, we had recess in the parking lot. There was some equipment available, but mostly we just ran around or sat and played jacks or something. If you were not part of a group you could wander around and not be part of anything and feel rather lost. I see the same thing at my youngest's school today. Bus rides are another tricky time. Bullies have great fun getting kids like our difficult children to do things - and rarely get caught. </p><p> </p><p>If things continue to be problematic, maybe your son needs an aide at recess, or maybe to have someone direct him into physical activity to keep him busy - walking or running around the edges of the playground would get the energy out and would help give him a task, which would mean less chances to get into trouble. Just an idea!</p><p> </p><p>The person who refused to refer you to a neuropsychologist is an idiot. Find someone else to do her job because she hasn't got a clue. Then find a neuropsychologist to give him a complete evaluation. There will be waiting lists of up to several MONTHS to get into specialists (we recently waited 5 MONTHS to see a specialist for my daughter, and it is a normal waiting time for him), but you are going to live those months anyway. Get on those waiting lists, and keep looking for other docs who might be able to help.</p><p> </p><p>Once again, Welcome!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 392641, member: 1233"] Hi and Welcome!!! Don't worry about the time you lurked - we understand that people speak up here when they are ready, and IF they are ready, and often need time to get to that point. I am just glad you finally spoke out - we can always enjoy another member. You asked if it was okay that school problems were handled at school and not at home. I think it is perfectly fine. Talking to your child about school, encouraging him to do his best, letting him know that you expect him to behave well at school is enough. He does NOT need to be punished at home for transgressions at school. My parents firmly believed that if we got into trouble in school we should get double punishment at home - twice as long or whatever. Reality was that it ruined a LOT of the little time my brother had at home, at least through 10th grade. My husband was fine with that idea, but we quickly learned that it would mean that just about every waking moment our oldest would be in trouble. It is no way to live. We learned that if we were to have ANY quality family time we needed to let the school handle school problems during school hours. If needed we would go to the school to help handle things, but school problems would NOT come hom. Period. Many other parents have also done this, simply because it was the ONLY way to let their child have anything positive in his life. Moving your son's medication time may be helpful, it is at least worth trying. Most kids have some type of trouble in the unstructured parts of the day, at least they do at some point. It is hard to figure out the social rules, and what is and isn't okay, during time when you are all together with little direction. Can you think back to recess when you were a kid? In the school I went to, we had recess in the parking lot. There was some equipment available, but mostly we just ran around or sat and played jacks or something. If you were not part of a group you could wander around and not be part of anything and feel rather lost. I see the same thing at my youngest's school today. Bus rides are another tricky time. Bullies have great fun getting kids like our difficult children to do things - and rarely get caught. If things continue to be problematic, maybe your son needs an aide at recess, or maybe to have someone direct him into physical activity to keep him busy - walking or running around the edges of the playground would get the energy out and would help give him a task, which would mean less chances to get into trouble. Just an idea! The person who refused to refer you to a neuropsychologist is an idiot. Find someone else to do her job because she hasn't got a clue. Then find a neuropsychologist to give him a complete evaluation. There will be waiting lists of up to several MONTHS to get into specialists (we recently waited 5 MONTHS to see a specialist for my daughter, and it is a normal waiting time for him), but you are going to live those months anyway. Get on those waiting lists, and keep looking for other docs who might be able to help. Once again, Welcome!!! [/QUOTE]
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