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<blockquote data-quote="Lila256" data-source="post: 722541" data-attributes="member: 22431"><p>Susie: What a handful you had. I cannot even imagine going through this type of thing with another child in the house. It was bad enough just with a cat! </p><p></p><p>And I know exactly what you mean when you realize you have just had it. I think my moment came when I was talking with the school/district officials on a conference call after he tried to kill his father because they wanted to do a risk assessment for when he came back to school to protect the teachers and other children. (My stepson was still in the psychiatric ward at the time.) We were going down this list of problematic behaviors, and I answered yes to almost all of them, and his teachers agreed. With each question, the district official got more and more quiet, and then finally said, "You know that these are indicators of very dangerous behavior, right?" I have a lot of experience with mental illness in the family and beyond, so I knew his behavior was highly problematic even for someone with mental illness. The teachers started chiming in, "Yeah, we usually only deal with this type of thing with kids who are being held [at the psychiatric hospital], not day students." Meaning we were the only family in the entire psychiatric specific school that still had our child at home with his level of severity. It was such validation in that moment, that I wasn't overreacting. It really was that bad. It really is dangerous.</p><p></p><p>I have thought that he had something similar to Antisocial Personality Disorder after the first couple years, in addition to whatever else is going on with him. We fought for so long to get diagnoses, and we were blocked at every step. "He'll grow out of it." "He is just immature." "He just needs to work through his history in counseling." Like as a parent you don't know that there is something severely not right. There was always an excuse, no matter how hard we fought. He was recently diagnosed by a neuropsychologist with high functioning autism and "prodromal stage severe mental illness," but his psychiatrist (who has seen him for a couple years now) disagrees on the autism part. It's been nothing but chaos in terms of his treatment, despite constant battle on our part.</p><p></p><p>Thank you so much for the welcome! I have been sharing my conversations here with my partner, which he's been enjoying. He isn't much for typing, so I doubt you'll ever see him "in person," but it is helping him by proxy. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lila256, post: 722541, member: 22431"] Susie: What a handful you had. I cannot even imagine going through this type of thing with another child in the house. It was bad enough just with a cat! And I know exactly what you mean when you realize you have just had it. I think my moment came when I was talking with the school/district officials on a conference call after he tried to kill his father because they wanted to do a risk assessment for when he came back to school to protect the teachers and other children. (My stepson was still in the psychiatric ward at the time.) We were going down this list of problematic behaviors, and I answered yes to almost all of them, and his teachers agreed. With each question, the district official got more and more quiet, and then finally said, "You know that these are indicators of very dangerous behavior, right?" I have a lot of experience with mental illness in the family and beyond, so I knew his behavior was highly problematic even for someone with mental illness. The teachers started chiming in, "Yeah, we usually only deal with this type of thing with kids who are being held [at the psychiatric hospital], not day students." Meaning we were the only family in the entire psychiatric specific school that still had our child at home with his level of severity. It was such validation in that moment, that I wasn't overreacting. It really was that bad. It really is dangerous. I have thought that he had something similar to Antisocial Personality Disorder after the first couple years, in addition to whatever else is going on with him. We fought for so long to get diagnoses, and we were blocked at every step. "He'll grow out of it." "He is just immature." "He just needs to work through his history in counseling." Like as a parent you don't know that there is something severely not right. There was always an excuse, no matter how hard we fought. He was recently diagnosed by a neuropsychologist with high functioning autism and "prodromal stage severe mental illness," but his psychiatrist (who has seen him for a couple years now) disagrees on the autism part. It's been nothing but chaos in terms of his treatment, despite constant battle on our part. Thank you so much for the welcome! I have been sharing my conversations here with my partner, which he's been enjoying. He isn't much for typing, so I doubt you'll ever see him "in person," but it is helping him by proxy. :-) [/QUOTE]
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