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Is it possible to help a difficult child too much??
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<blockquote data-quote="timer lady" data-source="post: 146397" data-attributes="member: 393"><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>The tweedles have huge supports in place; supports that were hard fought for & hard won. I had some who said that I was doing kt & wm a huge disservice by gathering this level of help.</strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>I knew in my heart, that if my children didn't have this level of help we would never see an increase in their emotional stability, their academics, their life skills - we would never see a maturity of any sort. So for the last 5 years we have had huge structure, supports & lots of one on one help for the tweedles.</strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>Now, as maturity is setting in, we are bit by bit removing the supports. Very slowly. Making, kt especially, start to make choices & accept the resulting consequences for those choices. And husband & I are seeing big steps & baby steps forward. Forward! </strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>This would not have happened if we had just let these kids slide. If we hadn't sought & put help in place for kt or wm. So I would have told psychiatrist & anyone else at that hospital that they are welcome to your difficult child for a week with-o the supports/help in place & see how they manage. I've offered the tweedles to various psychiatrists, tdocs & SWs on many an occasion - guess what? No takers. Go figure.</strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>It's all so very individual - almost like medications. What works for one child will not work for another. We know kt has worked hard & utilized, taken in all that has been offered to her. She is making strides, that frankly, surprise husband & myself. Her twin, wm, on the other hand, is making far fewer steps forward - continues to flounder. But not to the extent he was before placement in group home, his one on one, & day treatment. So we see baby steps with wm.</strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>I never take what a hospital psychiatrist has to say very seriously unless that psychiatrist is ready to go to the mat for my children. I only met one psychiatrist who was willing to fight for a decent treatment plan - talk with the tweedles outpatient psychiatrist & therapist to work out a discharge plan. That is a man I will listen to - that is the one psychiatrist who didn't criticize what I had put in place for kt or wm. Didn't question the need.</strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>If your child needs it - get them the help. As they mature, grow start pulling slowly back. Our job as parents is to raise our children to function at the highest level possible with whatever means available to help them. </strong></span></p><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong></strong></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="timer lady, post: 146397, member: 393"] [COLOR=Teal][B]The tweedles have huge supports in place; supports that were hard fought for & hard won. I had some who said that I was doing kt & wm a huge disservice by gathering this level of help. I knew in my heart, that if my children didn't have this level of help we would never see an increase in their emotional stability, their academics, their life skills - we would never see a maturity of any sort. So for the last 5 years we have had huge structure, supports & lots of one on one help for the tweedles. Now, as maturity is setting in, we are bit by bit removing the supports. Very slowly. Making, kt especially, start to make choices & accept the resulting consequences for those choices. And husband & I are seeing big steps & baby steps forward. Forward! This would not have happened if we had just let these kids slide. If we hadn't sought & put help in place for kt or wm. So I would have told psychiatrist & anyone else at that hospital that they are welcome to your difficult child for a week with-o the supports/help in place & see how they manage. I've offered the tweedles to various psychiatrists, tdocs & SWs on many an occasion - guess what? No takers. Go figure. It's all so very individual - almost like medications. What works for one child will not work for another. We know kt has worked hard & utilized, taken in all that has been offered to her. She is making strides, that frankly, surprise husband & myself. Her twin, wm, on the other hand, is making far fewer steps forward - continues to flounder. But not to the extent he was before placement in group home, his one on one, & day treatment. So we see baby steps with wm. I never take what a hospital psychiatrist has to say very seriously unless that psychiatrist is ready to go to the mat for my children. I only met one psychiatrist who was willing to fight for a decent treatment plan - talk with the tweedles outpatient psychiatrist & therapist to work out a discharge plan. That is a man I will listen to - that is the one psychiatrist who didn't criticize what I had put in place for kt or wm. Didn't question the need. If your child needs it - get them the help. As they mature, grow start pulling slowly back. Our job as parents is to raise our children to function at the highest level possible with whatever means available to help them. [/B][/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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