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Substance Abuse
Issues with my son
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 746726" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I was going to say that I agree completely with RN, except that our sons TL are a breed apart.</p><p></p><p>I was going to say this: <em>There has to be connecting with internal resources and operating based upon those. And I think this is where our kids are having trouble. It is not to say that they don't have inner resources, but so far, they have not been able to access them. </em></p><p><em></em></p><p>And there you go. With the program you held firm 100 percent and he capitulated. Son was testing. RN was right. And you passed the test.</p><p></p><p>If you're right and son is calculating and strategizing based upon his short term interests and goals, which seem to be housing and support, with maximum freedom and autonomy, you've learned something. If you hold firm, tell the truth, and don't get ahead of yourself, you can support him to make better decisions.</p><p></p><p>I think the key here is not to be afraid. And to have the confidence that he will respond to support and his best interest.</p><p></p><p>Oh. This would terrify me. I have a very hard time doing this. Trusting that the right thing will happen.</p><p></p><p>But you did it. With the program's help. I admire them so. And I admire you, TL. Sometimes the worst thing does NOT happen.</p><p></p><p>With the program you held the line 100 percent, and it worked. There is no reason to believe it won't keep working.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 746726, member: 18958"] I was going to say that I agree completely with RN, except that our sons TL are a breed apart. I was going to say this: [I]There has to be connecting with internal resources and operating based upon those. And I think this is where our kids are having trouble. It is not to say that they don't have inner resources, but so far, they have not been able to access them. [/I] And there you go. With the program you held firm 100 percent and he capitulated. Son was testing. RN was right. And you passed the test. If you're right and son is calculating and strategizing based upon his short term interests and goals, which seem to be housing and support, with maximum freedom and autonomy, you've learned something. If you hold firm, tell the truth, and don't get ahead of yourself, you can support him to make better decisions. I think the key here is not to be afraid. And to have the confidence that he will respond to support and his best interest. Oh. This would terrify me. I have a very hard time doing this. Trusting that the right thing will happen. But you did it. With the program's help. I admire them so. And I admire you, TL. Sometimes the worst thing does NOT happen. With the program you held the line 100 percent, and it worked. There is no reason to believe it won't keep working. [/QUOTE]
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