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<blockquote data-quote="Smithmom" data-source="post: 740546" data-attributes="member: 23371"><p>My son is a heroin addict. The chances of a heroin addict seeing 30 aren't good. Plus he was selling street level to support his habit. Was violently robbed at gunpoint several times. Injected himself in the neck one time when he couldn't find a vein. I know the fear that he won't make it another few mo. Thus my great relief that he's in prison 9 yrs. Credit ratings? LOL. He will never get housing or a job for selling to support his habit. No violence. No gun use. He is an addict. That's what our system does with repeat offenders. But mine is alive and statistically much more likely to see 40. I haven't seen anything on this board I haven't lived through. </p><p></p><p>So Elsi I feel your pain. We live with these fears. Now I have to worry about what happens in prisons. Only difference between you and I is that years ago I had to detach. I have younger kids with different problems. I needed to function. So I learned to detach. I didn't run when he needed help. Period. He knew I wouldn't. I didn't go to police stations, courts, hospitals he knew I wouldn't so didn't even call. Lousy mother? Probably what he told everyone. But he started using at 11. His behavior went down long before that. By the time he was 18 the state, and every program, therapist and doctor had given up. Before 18 I had to run. State forced me to take him home at 17. After 18 it was over. So call me callous. I also detached when he was in elementary from what other parents said. Detachment is the only way to your life. Maybe you will outlive them. But what will you be by then? What life will you have left? What do you deserve?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Smithmom, post: 740546, member: 23371"] My son is a heroin addict. The chances of a heroin addict seeing 30 aren't good. Plus he was selling street level to support his habit. Was violently robbed at gunpoint several times. Injected himself in the neck one time when he couldn't find a vein. I know the fear that he won't make it another few mo. Thus my great relief that he's in prison 9 yrs. Credit ratings? LOL. He will never get housing or a job for selling to support his habit. No violence. No gun use. He is an addict. That's what our system does with repeat offenders. But mine is alive and statistically much more likely to see 40. I haven't seen anything on this board I haven't lived through. So Elsi I feel your pain. We live with these fears. Now I have to worry about what happens in prisons. Only difference between you and I is that years ago I had to detach. I have younger kids with different problems. I needed to function. So I learned to detach. I didn't run when he needed help. Period. He knew I wouldn't. I didn't go to police stations, courts, hospitals he knew I wouldn't so didn't even call. Lousy mother? Probably what he told everyone. But he started using at 11. His behavior went down long before that. By the time he was 18 the state, and every program, therapist and doctor had given up. Before 18 I had to run. State forced me to take him home at 17. After 18 it was over. So call me callous. I also detached when he was in elementary from what other parents said. Detachment is the only way to your life. Maybe you will outlive them. But what will you be by then? What life will you have left? What do you deserve? [/QUOTE]
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