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<blockquote data-quote="healinginside" data-source="post: 763807" data-attributes="member: 29962"><p>I'm sorry you are going through this with your son and husband. There is a book called "I'm not sick, I don't need help" that is a great resource for families with loved ones with schizophrenia or any type of mental disorders. It is about how to handle these conversations when they are having delusions. It was written by a psychiatrist who had a brother with schizophrenia named Dr. Xavier Amador and is a great resource for families. It says DO NOT try to argue with them bc they believe their delusions are real. If you can't get the book, you can google the name of the book and there is a free copy on the NAMI (national association of mental illness) site and there is a YouTube video of a TedTalk the dr did that has great help. He gives a simple method of communication with your loved one called LEAP - listen, empathize, agree and partner. Part of this is that the loved one just wants to be heard and you are getting yourself emotionally distressed by having these arguments that these things are "not real" and it isn't helping (only hurting you).</p><p></p><p>I don't think your husband could fault you into using these resources.</p><p></p><p>Would your husband attend a NARANON meeting with you online on zoom? It can be completely anonymous and you don't have to even show your face.</p><p></p><p>I joined in January and I cannot tell you how much it has helped to know there are THOUSANDS of moms going through the same thing as you are.</p><p></p><p>My son has the same side effects from marijuana and it is worsened by some type of speed drugs. But he even gets it with marijuana. I can tell you that he went into rehab and it has gotten much better now that he is off of the harder drugs. I still see it if ge gets in a stressful situation but nothing like before.</p><p></p><p>Hold on to hope. You've been with your husband for so many years and you don't want to lose him. You also can't stomach throwing your son out. Your son loves you but deep down he knows his actions are hurting you. If your husband leaves, will your son change? Probably not but the only difference is that you will be alone and will be even more depressed from losing your husband. Find a way to come together with your husband. Tell him that you guys are "better together". He knows that, but he has reached his breaking point with your son. </p><p></p><p>I wish you luck and prayers</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="healinginside, post: 763807, member: 29962"] I'm sorry you are going through this with your son and husband. There is a book called "I'm not sick, I don't need help" that is a great resource for families with loved ones with schizophrenia or any type of mental disorders. It is about how to handle these conversations when they are having delusions. It was written by a psychiatrist who had a brother with schizophrenia named Dr. Xavier Amador and is a great resource for families. It says DO NOT try to argue with them bc they believe their delusions are real. If you can't get the book, you can google the name of the book and there is a free copy on the NAMI (national association of mental illness) site and there is a YouTube video of a TedTalk the dr did that has great help. He gives a simple method of communication with your loved one called LEAP - listen, empathize, agree and partner. Part of this is that the loved one just wants to be heard and you are getting yourself emotionally distressed by having these arguments that these things are "not real" and it isn't helping (only hurting you). I don't think your husband could fault you into using these resources. Would your husband attend a NARANON meeting with you online on zoom? It can be completely anonymous and you don't have to even show your face. I joined in January and I cannot tell you how much it has helped to know there are THOUSANDS of moms going through the same thing as you are. My son has the same side effects from marijuana and it is worsened by some type of speed drugs. But he even gets it with marijuana. I can tell you that he went into rehab and it has gotten much better now that he is off of the harder drugs. I still see it if ge gets in a stressful situation but nothing like before. Hold on to hope. You've been with your husband for so many years and you don't want to lose him. You also can't stomach throwing your son out. Your son loves you but deep down he knows his actions are hurting you. If your husband leaves, will your son change? Probably not but the only difference is that you will be alone and will be even more depressed from losing your husband. Find a way to come together with your husband. Tell him that you guys are "better together". He knows that, but he has reached his breaking point with your son. I wish you luck and prayers [/QUOTE]
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