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It's Getting Really Old
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<blockquote data-quote="Bunny" data-source="post: 477097"><p>I sent an e-mail to the therapist the day after he makes this announcement, basically telling him that I think it's party an attention thing and what am I supposed to do now? He has yet to get back to me about it, and I'm not pleased, to say the very least. Seriously, I don't know what I'm supposed to say to him when he says to me that I don't love him. We've said that it's not true, that we do love him. I've tried the tactic of "that must make you feel really sad to feel that way, but it's something that we're working on so that you can see that you truly are loved". I don't know if he says it because it's how he really feels, or if he says it because he thinks that it will get him attetnion. </p><p></p><p>If it's an attention thing, fine. I have been trying my best to spend time with him, but even that causes issues. He'll ask me to do something, like play cards. He loves to play cards. So, many times I tell him that we'll do it after dinner. He's happy with that answer. So, after dinner when I've cleaned everything up and am ready to play with him he decides that he doesn't want to do it. But then, later when it's time to go to bed he's having fits because I didn't play cards with him like I said I would. </p><p></p><p>This is something that he does, and it's something that we've brought up with the therapist. Basically, he wants me to be at his beck and call. When he wants me he expects me to drop everything and spend time with him. Sorry, but that just doesn't work. It's unrealistic, but he refuses to see that. Again, he wants what he wants when he wants it. Nothing less will do.</p><p></p><p>It happened again this morning. He took a book out of the school library on French cooking. I asked him to come and look through the book with me so that I had an idea what he was looking at trying to make so that I know what I need to have in the house. He threw the book on the kitchen table and said, "Look through it yourself." I tried to remind him that the idea was that this was something that we do together because we both like to cook and it's something that we can share. Apparently, it's not the moment that he wanted my attention, so it's not important to him. But later, when I don't have what he wants in the house, I'm sure that I'm going to hear about how I didn't sit and go through the book with him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Bunny, post: 477097"] I sent an e-mail to the therapist the day after he makes this announcement, basically telling him that I think it's party an attention thing and what am I supposed to do now? He has yet to get back to me about it, and I'm not pleased, to say the very least. Seriously, I don't know what I'm supposed to say to him when he says to me that I don't love him. We've said that it's not true, that we do love him. I've tried the tactic of "that must make you feel really sad to feel that way, but it's something that we're working on so that you can see that you truly are loved". I don't know if he says it because it's how he really feels, or if he says it because he thinks that it will get him attetnion. If it's an attention thing, fine. I have been trying my best to spend time with him, but even that causes issues. He'll ask me to do something, like play cards. He loves to play cards. So, many times I tell him that we'll do it after dinner. He's happy with that answer. So, after dinner when I've cleaned everything up and am ready to play with him he decides that he doesn't want to do it. But then, later when it's time to go to bed he's having fits because I didn't play cards with him like I said I would. This is something that he does, and it's something that we've brought up with the therapist. Basically, he wants me to be at his beck and call. When he wants me he expects me to drop everything and spend time with him. Sorry, but that just doesn't work. It's unrealistic, but he refuses to see that. Again, he wants what he wants when he wants it. Nothing less will do. It happened again this morning. He took a book out of the school library on French cooking. I asked him to come and look through the book with me so that I had an idea what he was looking at trying to make so that I know what I need to have in the house. He threw the book on the kitchen table and said, "Look through it yourself." I tried to remind him that the idea was that this was something that we do together because we both like to cook and it's something that we can share. Apparently, it's not the moment that he wanted my attention, so it's not important to him. But later, when I don't have what he wants in the house, I'm sure that I'm going to hear about how I didn't sit and go through the book with him. [/QUOTE]
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