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Joy of Motherhood?
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<blockquote data-quote="Methuselah" data-source="post: 456979" data-attributes="member: 12725"><p>A couple of years ago I stood in the middle of my family room and actually bellowed the following: Where's my Joy of Motherhood? I've been ripped off! Ripped off I tell ya! (Did diddly, but it felt good. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" />)</p><p></p><p>difficult child 1, difficult child 2 and Slugger share the same bio mom, different dads. So far, Slugger is cruising down normal street. He is entering puberty, so who knows what will happen with the tsunami of testosterone that's about to hit. He is able to admit he has done something wrong and learn from the consequences. He can grasp and care that others are affected by the things he does. I feel if any issues come up that's what will get him out of them. The girls are unable to do that. </p><p></p><p>difficult child 1 has already been expelled from school and thrown in jail school for drinking on campus. (The reason she drank on campus? No one told her she wasn't suppose to do that! :-/ I proceeded to list all the ways my underage, diabetic daughter was told not to drink.) Her first week back at her regular school she was back to popping ecstasy and sexua</p><p>dalliances during school. Jail school didn't affect her deviant behavior; standing in front of the judge was like waiting inline for the movies to her. It was sadly eye opening. However, it did solidify her philosophy "good people are not suspected of doing bad things." Her grades are now pretty decent, not bc she is striving for academic behavior. She was given "Outstanding Student" at jail school with the "you won't be back here" pat on the back from her case worker. She figured out teachers don't look at the "good" kids, so she can give a boy a rub under the cafeteria table. :-/</p><p></p><p>Consequences, no matter good or bad, reasonable or obnoxious change their behavior. It is frustrating, baffling and weird. It is hard to teach right from wrong when rewards, consequences, and punishments mean nothing. I couldn't trust them in a work environment, so they don't have that privilege. And it is a privilege and not a right. We have talked about it with them. They just stare at us, for the most part. </p><p></p><p>My husband and I are solid, but we worry cracks are going to start to appear. My husband is a wonderful person. He is kind and diplomatic, in ways I can only learn from. It is hard to watch him become so frustrated and hurt.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Methuselah, post: 456979, member: 12725"] A couple of years ago I stood in the middle of my family room and actually bellowed the following: Where's my Joy of Motherhood? I've been ripped off! Ripped off I tell ya! (Did diddly, but it felt good. :)) difficult child 1, difficult child 2 and Slugger share the same bio mom, different dads. So far, Slugger is cruising down normal street. He is entering puberty, so who knows what will happen with the tsunami of testosterone that's about to hit. He is able to admit he has done something wrong and learn from the consequences. He can grasp and care that others are affected by the things he does. I feel if any issues come up that's what will get him out of them. The girls are unable to do that. difficult child 1 has already been expelled from school and thrown in jail school for drinking on campus. (The reason she drank on campus? No one told her she wasn't suppose to do that! :-/ I proceeded to list all the ways my underage, diabetic daughter was told not to drink.) Her first week back at her regular school she was back to popping ecstasy and sexua dalliances during school. Jail school didn't affect her deviant behavior; standing in front of the judge was like waiting inline for the movies to her. It was sadly eye opening. However, it did solidify her philosophy "good people are not suspected of doing bad things." Her grades are now pretty decent, not bc she is striving for academic behavior. She was given "Outstanding Student" at jail school with the "you won't be back here" pat on the back from her case worker. She figured out teachers don't look at the "good" kids, so she can give a boy a rub under the cafeteria table. :-/ Consequences, no matter good or bad, reasonable or obnoxious change their behavior. It is frustrating, baffling and weird. It is hard to teach right from wrong when rewards, consequences, and punishments mean nothing. I couldn't trust them in a work environment, so they don't have that privilege. And it is a privilege and not a right. We have talked about it with them. They just stare at us, for the most part. My husband and I are solid, but we worry cracks are going to start to appear. My husband is a wonderful person. He is kind and diplomatic, in ways I can only learn from. It is hard to watch him become so frustrated and hurt. [/QUOTE]
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