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Parent Emeritus
Just plain angry
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 488058"><p>A few weeks ago when my difficult child was here for court I was feeling very sad for him and the situation he got himself into...and it made me feel just sad and that sadness was rather immobilizing (for an evening anyway). Then I found out he blew us all off and didn't get on the plane he was supposed to and i got mad, really mad. Didn't express it to him but it was more internal.</p><p></p><p>And I realized that mad is much better than sad, at least for me. I found that anger spurred me forward, made me think about how to enjoy MY life, how to not enable him, made me want to do for me rather than wallow in the quagmire that is him. It is healthy to be mad at times. It is a good thing for survival. </p><p></p><p>Yes it can eat at you if you go forever without letting the anger go, but it doesn't sound to me like you are talking about that situation.</p><p></p><p>So yes feel your anger and let it move you forward. That is a good thing.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 488058"] A few weeks ago when my difficult child was here for court I was feeling very sad for him and the situation he got himself into...and it made me feel just sad and that sadness was rather immobilizing (for an evening anyway). Then I found out he blew us all off and didn't get on the plane he was supposed to and i got mad, really mad. Didn't express it to him but it was more internal. And I realized that mad is much better than sad, at least for me. I found that anger spurred me forward, made me think about how to enjoy MY life, how to not enable him, made me want to do for me rather than wallow in the quagmire that is him. It is healthy to be mad at times. It is a good thing for survival. Yes it can eat at you if you go forever without letting the anger go, but it doesn't sound to me like you are talking about that situation. So yes feel your anger and let it move you forward. That is a good thing. TL [/QUOTE]
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