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<blockquote data-quote="LittleDudesMom" data-source="post: 39563" data-attributes="member: 805"><p>I think pinpointing why she's having the behavior issues is important before trying to add something that may cause more stress and anxiety.</p><p></p><p>I know for my difficult child, coming home is important. It's tough holding it together for 6 hours and he needs to chill. That does mean computer or tv for him - he needs the time to unwind and not worry about performing, etc. We have, over the last couple years, had him do some limited after school activities, but he has asked for them (science, drawing, chess). I will tell you, that on days when he had "had enough", I would actually get a call from him saying "Mom, I don't want to stay for drawing class today." Sure enough, when I would go pick him up I could tell that he would not have been successful in the after school class.</p><p></p><p>Perhaps allowing her to come home and chill for an hour or so, without making demands on her, would be helpful. It would be worse if both she and the younger two were all surly at the same time out in public!!!!!!! Set aside her down time after school, then set aside her homework time. If the homework is the culprit, that needs to be addressed seperately.</p><p></p><p>I woud try giving her some unstructured down time after school. If you have an issue with too much tv or computer, give her a specif amount of time for that after school so she can be alone, then make playing outside, or with legos, or her barbies or something else the next step. Then, homework and dinner.</p><p></p><p>When my children were younger like your two little ones, I always planned and prepped my dinner in the morning when they were happy and playing. Then, when they got fussy or demanding, I just had to pop something in the oven, ect.</p><p></p><p>Another idea would be to involve her in some neighborhood sports league which tend to be less competitive and maybe only meet once a week to practise and then once for a game. Perhaps your local parks and rec would have some cool after school program once a week.</p><p></p><p>Good luck.</p><p></p><p>Sharon</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LittleDudesMom, post: 39563, member: 805"] I think pinpointing why she's having the behavior issues is important before trying to add something that may cause more stress and anxiety. I know for my difficult child, coming home is important. It's tough holding it together for 6 hours and he needs to chill. That does mean computer or tv for him - he needs the time to unwind and not worry about performing, etc. We have, over the last couple years, had him do some limited after school activities, but he has asked for them (science, drawing, chess). I will tell you, that on days when he had "had enough", I would actually get a call from him saying "Mom, I don't want to stay for drawing class today." Sure enough, when I would go pick him up I could tell that he would not have been successful in the after school class. Perhaps allowing her to come home and chill for an hour or so, without making demands on her, would be helpful. It would be worse if both she and the younger two were all surly at the same time out in public!!!!!!! Set aside her down time after school, then set aside her homework time. If the homework is the culprit, that needs to be addressed seperately. I woud try giving her some unstructured down time after school. If you have an issue with too much tv or computer, give her a specif amount of time for that after school so she can be alone, then make playing outside, or with legos, or her barbies or something else the next step. Then, homework and dinner. When my children were younger like your two little ones, I always planned and prepped my dinner in the morning when they were happy and playing. Then, when they got fussy or demanding, I just had to pop something in the oven, ect. Another idea would be to involve her in some neighborhood sports league which tend to be less competitive and maybe only meet once a week to practise and then once for a game. Perhaps your local parks and rec would have some cool after school program once a week. Good luck. Sharon [/QUOTE]
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