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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 593155" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>Hello, Well things here are a bit all over the place. My difficult child is still at the sober house... he and I have had some good text conversations lately. I am trying to stay very neutral about everything and make no judgements. I am still happy that he wrote that I love you text.... it is a big small step. I havent heard from my friend who runs the sober house which I think means that things are not great (or he would call me) or really terrible (or he would call me) so I am just trying to stay calm, not focus too much on it. I went through my funk after I read Clean and had to sort out myself.... I think I basically came back to the same place which is my difficult child has to find his own way and i will continue to support him when he is doing the next right thing... and not enable him when he is not. I really do wonder about mental health issues... I do feel like this is a big part of things and he is not really been properly or clearly diagnosed (although over the years we sure have tried!) but he is on medications and I think (hope) those are helping.</p><p></p><p>My easy child is doing really well. Getting ready to graduate from high school, work this summer and then go off to college. I feel very lucky with her and we have a great relationship. She is starting to experiement with some things lately (as most kids her age do) but man she is talking to me about it and she is still very responsible in all of her thinking which just amazes me. As my therapist told me I have one kid who generally makes really good decisions who sometimes is going to make a mistake, and one kid who tends to make really bad decisions, but now and then make some godo ones!</p><p></p><p>husband and I are doing well.... getting ready for the empty nest in the fall. I have very mixed feeling about this and just want to make sure I fill my life with things that are important to me that I like to do!!!</p><p></p><p>And the thing that today is making me very very sad is that we are taking our 13 year old yellow lab to the vet tonight and almost certainly will make the decision to put her down. It is time.... it has been coming for awhile but she now does seem miserable and ready to go. Its a hard thing to do as we have had her since she was 6 weeks old. One thing I was worried was how to tell difficult child and how he would react. We did have a text convo about it and I think he did say he would like to see her which is not possible... then he posted on FB about her. I then put a picture of her on FB which he copied to his wall and wrote a touching goodbye to her. So I do feel that in his way he has been part of the process. Makes me sad to reminisice though... he was in 2nd grade when we got her after our old dog died. He has loved her a lot as we all have.</p><p></p><p>So thats it from here.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 593155, member: 15801"] Hello, Well things here are a bit all over the place. My difficult child is still at the sober house... he and I have had some good text conversations lately. I am trying to stay very neutral about everything and make no judgements. I am still happy that he wrote that I love you text.... it is a big small step. I havent heard from my friend who runs the sober house which I think means that things are not great (or he would call me) or really terrible (or he would call me) so I am just trying to stay calm, not focus too much on it. I went through my funk after I read Clean and had to sort out myself.... I think I basically came back to the same place which is my difficult child has to find his own way and i will continue to support him when he is doing the next right thing... and not enable him when he is not. I really do wonder about mental health issues... I do feel like this is a big part of things and he is not really been properly or clearly diagnosed (although over the years we sure have tried!) but he is on medications and I think (hope) those are helping. My easy child is doing really well. Getting ready to graduate from high school, work this summer and then go off to college. I feel very lucky with her and we have a great relationship. She is starting to experiement with some things lately (as most kids her age do) but man she is talking to me about it and she is still very responsible in all of her thinking which just amazes me. As my therapist told me I have one kid who generally makes really good decisions who sometimes is going to make a mistake, and one kid who tends to make really bad decisions, but now and then make some godo ones! husband and I are doing well.... getting ready for the empty nest in the fall. I have very mixed feeling about this and just want to make sure I fill my life with things that are important to me that I like to do!!! And the thing that today is making me very very sad is that we are taking our 13 year old yellow lab to the vet tonight and almost certainly will make the decision to put her down. It is time.... it has been coming for awhile but she now does seem miserable and ready to go. Its a hard thing to do as we have had her since she was 6 weeks old. One thing I was worried was how to tell difficult child and how he would react. We did have a text convo about it and I think he did say he would like to see her which is not possible... then he posted on FB about her. I then put a picture of her on FB which he copied to his wall and wrote a touching goodbye to her. So I do feel that in his way he has been part of the process. Makes me sad to reminisice though... he was in 2nd grade when we got her after our old dog died. He has loved her a lot as we all have. So thats it from here. TL [/QUOTE]
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