Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Letter to my son
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 614116" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Lil....it feels good to write things down and get it out. Now DO NOT send that letter. Your friend is correct, you have done far tooo much for him. I would not have replaced the phone. When my difficult child broke her phone she got to use one of our old phones until her contract was up. He sold his computer? Too bad no more computer. My difficult child tried to seel hers on craigslist and when I foudn out I told her if that computer was sold, stolen, lost or broken she would just have to do without until she could buy one herself.</p><p></p><p>I strongly suggest you find a parent support group in your area to help you learn how to detach from his behavior and set limits. Yoir son is not going to read that letter. I tried that with my difficult child, she just htrew them away, admitted later she never read them. If he were my difficult child, and I did have much the same issue with mine who was in college and not going to class and smoking pot and drinking and just having a party on our money, I would be telling him that he either lives on the budget you provide him and go to class and get passing grades or he comes home and gets a job (minimum wage by the way because that's all he will be qualified for) and follow the house rules....or find alternative living arrangements.</p><p> </p><p>I know I sound hard but we have been through h*ll and back with our difficult child and I finally got to the point where I was no longer willing to live that way and I would no longer support her partying. She is now living with her boyfriend and working a minimum wage job and tells me every day how she really messed up her life by not taking advanatge of the opportunity to go to college and make something of her life. It makes me sad but I have come to terms with it. I could not force her to do what she was bound and determined not to.</p><p></p><p>Your son will not take anything you say in that letter seriously. He will not modify any of his behavior because of it. It's time for you and husband to come up with a plan and outline it for him and allow him to decide how he wants his future to go.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 614116, member: 59"] Lil....it feels good to write things down and get it out. Now DO NOT send that letter. Your friend is correct, you have done far tooo much for him. I would not have replaced the phone. When my difficult child broke her phone she got to use one of our old phones until her contract was up. He sold his computer? Too bad no more computer. My difficult child tried to seel hers on craigslist and when I foudn out I told her if that computer was sold, stolen, lost or broken she would just have to do without until she could buy one herself. I strongly suggest you find a parent support group in your area to help you learn how to detach from his behavior and set limits. Yoir son is not going to read that letter. I tried that with my difficult child, she just htrew them away, admitted later she never read them. If he were my difficult child, and I did have much the same issue with mine who was in college and not going to class and smoking pot and drinking and just having a party on our money, I would be telling him that he either lives on the budget you provide him and go to class and get passing grades or he comes home and gets a job (minimum wage by the way because that's all he will be qualified for) and follow the house rules....or find alternative living arrangements. I know I sound hard but we have been through h*ll and back with our difficult child and I finally got to the point where I was no longer willing to live that way and I would no longer support her partying. She is now living with her boyfriend and working a minimum wage job and tells me every day how she really messed up her life by not taking advanatge of the opportunity to go to college and make something of her life. It makes me sad but I have come to terms with it. I could not force her to do what she was bound and determined not to. Your son will not take anything you say in that letter seriously. He will not modify any of his behavior because of it. It's time for you and husband to come up with a plan and outline it for him and allow him to decide how he wants his future to go. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Letter to my son
Top