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Looking for some shared wisdom as period of no contact ends
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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 621265" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>Cedar, Recovering, PJ4, Trinity,</p><p></p><p>thank you for checking in.</p><p></p><p>I sent him a message on FB inviting him to lunch..although I could see he read it almost right away he didn't respond for about 48 hours...that always gives me a rueful laugh, when I gear myself up for some kind of action and it then falls into a void without a sound. </p><p></p><p>He did call eventually. We agreed to lunch next Friday (a week from tomorrow). At first he was going to call in late to work to meet me this week, but I discouraged that (for heavens sake DON"T CALL IN LATE TO WORK!!!) So we will see. He was already talking about moving back out of the crack house...but he said the only place to go is under the bridge. And it is cold here now and going to be cold for 10 days. So I said...hmmm you might want to stay somewhere with a roof while this cold spell lasts.</p><p></p><p>Overall...fine. And the week pause feels good. </p><p></p><p>I've been quiet because SO and I have been at desperate odds. He is his own form of difficult child...both fantastically loving and supportive and fantastically awful, I'm gonna say related to his toxic childhood (but wait!!! maybe he is just a difficult child telling stories to new arrivals! maybe...maybe...it wasn't toxic at all? Maybe I am the wife and girlfriend others have talked about!!)</p><p></p><p>Anyway..he went bankrupt and lost his house over the last year. Now living with me, and I give him money to cover car, health insurance and some spending money, as I have for 4 months now. He is 8 years younger than I...46...not too long ago I was reading about some one's 40 something difficult child and I had the awful though...wow...if I were to post about SO in another guise, and call him my son...I suspect you would all tell me to cut him off!!!!!!</p><p></p><p>So struggling a lot with that, which is out of the purview of this forum..still, our other relationships are interesting...and, like recovering...SO was the first one to stand beside me (as he has for more than 4 years now) in dealing with difficult child, including driving me to NY to visit him at the much-storied Bellevue when he was involuntarily committed there for 6 weeks a few years ago...not many men, not many BOYFRIENDS would go there...so we shall keep struggling.</p><p></p><p>Thanks for checking in, I am still here, just exhausted.</p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 621265, member: 17269"] Cedar, Recovering, PJ4, Trinity, thank you for checking in. I sent him a message on FB inviting him to lunch..although I could see he read it almost right away he didn't respond for about 48 hours...that always gives me a rueful laugh, when I gear myself up for some kind of action and it then falls into a void without a sound. He did call eventually. We agreed to lunch next Friday (a week from tomorrow). At first he was going to call in late to work to meet me this week, but I discouraged that (for heavens sake DON"T CALL IN LATE TO WORK!!!) So we will see. He was already talking about moving back out of the crack house...but he said the only place to go is under the bridge. And it is cold here now and going to be cold for 10 days. So I said...hmmm you might want to stay somewhere with a roof while this cold spell lasts. Overall...fine. And the week pause feels good. I've been quiet because SO and I have been at desperate odds. He is his own form of difficult child...both fantastically loving and supportive and fantastically awful, I'm gonna say related to his toxic childhood (but wait!!! maybe he is just a difficult child telling stories to new arrivals! maybe...maybe...it wasn't toxic at all? Maybe I am the wife and girlfriend others have talked about!!) Anyway..he went bankrupt and lost his house over the last year. Now living with me, and I give him money to cover car, health insurance and some spending money, as I have for 4 months now. He is 8 years younger than I...46...not too long ago I was reading about some one's 40 something difficult child and I had the awful though...wow...if I were to post about SO in another guise, and call him my son...I suspect you would all tell me to cut him off!!!!!! So struggling a lot with that, which is out of the purview of this forum..still, our other relationships are interesting...and, like recovering...SO was the first one to stand beside me (as he has for more than 4 years now) in dealing with difficult child, including driving me to NY to visit him at the much-storied Bellevue when he was involuntarily committed there for 6 weeks a few years ago...not many men, not many BOYFRIENDS would go there...so we shall keep struggling. Thanks for checking in, I am still here, just exhausted. Echo [/QUOTE]
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