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General Parenting
Manipulation question
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 262731" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>I think it matters how often that type of exchange takes place. (Mind you this opinioin is not based on my excellent parenting choices years ago.<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/redface.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":redface:" title="redface :redface:" data-shortname=":redface:" />)</p><p></p><p>If it were an unusual chore or responsibility that seemed to require an incentive then I would see nothing wrong with a reminder. From experience, however, I think that as childrens cognitive abilities increase they see those times as either an opportunity for a power play or a demeaning bribe. Of course it depends on the child/teen. Standard chores never had a reward around here as everyone had daily duties including them.</p><p></p><p>My Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) grown easy child/difficult child who used to be meticulous about himself and kept a pretty clean bedroom/bath etc. is now like a 13 year old. It is driving me crazy because I can't find a solution. It's not right for me to clean after a grown man. He has <strong>no </strong>motivation to do it. Because of his Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) he "thinks" he has had a shower etc. and will go three or four days with-o one unless I bring it up.....which results in him being resentful. Like your example (and against my own judgement..lol) I have tried bribing him lately. Not! DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 262731, member: 35"] I think it matters how often that type of exchange takes place. (Mind you this opinioin is not based on my excellent parenting choices years ago.:blushing:) If it were an unusual chore or responsibility that seemed to require an incentive then I would see nothing wrong with a reminder. From experience, however, I think that as childrens cognitive abilities increase they see those times as either an opportunity for a power play or a demeaning bribe. Of course it depends on the child/teen. Standard chores never had a reward around here as everyone had daily duties including them. My Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) grown easy child/difficult child who used to be meticulous about himself and kept a pretty clean bedroom/bath etc. is now like a 13 year old. It is driving me crazy because I can't find a solution. It's not right for me to clean after a grown man. He has [B]no [/B]motivation to do it. Because of his Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) he "thinks" he has had a shower etc. and will go three or four days with-o one unless I bring it up.....which results in him being resentful. Like your example (and against my own judgement..lol) I have tried bribing him lately. Not! DDD [/QUOTE]
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