Beth,
I'm not sure manipulation is a behavior that can be totally stopped. Rather, I think that you have to learn to work with your difficult child.
kt is rather infamous for her ability to manipulate; to triagulate. If she can't get her way one way - she'll get it another. It's non-stop chaos. It can be happy, crazy & hyper chaos. It can be angry, loud & defiant chaos. kt will use whatever she can to get whatever is on her mind at that moment.
It's been a long slow journey to begin to see improvement in this area. The biggest hurdle to manipulation is to have everyone, I mean everyone, who works with your difficult child be on the same page. That means you must be willing to open up & share things with people you might rather not. All these people must ahead of time agree to the reaction or response to a difficult children manipulative antics.
Consistent responses to the reactive challenges that difficult child throws your way is a must.
kt is light years ahead of wm; it's sad to see.
Good luck with this. I don't thing we'll ever totally overcome this negative behavior with the tweedles.
