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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 623562" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I so understand the only major difference is I have been in this relationship since 1983!</p><p></p><p>For most of our lives it has been me with the mood issues and raging behaviors. Now in the past 5 or 6 years, Tony has been right there with me. I know stress is a major problem is at the root of all that is going on with us. That is one of the main reasons we moved out and left the house to the kids. The price of rent is cheaper than therapy...lol. </p><p></p><p>We are still pretty much stuck in the ways we have been reacting to each other for the past several years. I can have a very sharp tongue and often use it to try to hurt the other person before they can hurt me. I have to work harder on changing that. Most likely if I change, he will too. We also have issues with intimacy but very different from yours. I believe he has a medical problem and that does undermine his belief in himself. Also he is getting so tired from working so hard. I worry about that. One bad thing in our case right now is that I have been so sick since we moved to this new place so it has been hard for me to do all the little things I want to do like get the place fixed up and cook a meal every night.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 623562, member: 1514"] I so understand the only major difference is I have been in this relationship since 1983! For most of our lives it has been me with the mood issues and raging behaviors. Now in the past 5 or 6 years, Tony has been right there with me. I know stress is a major problem is at the root of all that is going on with us. That is one of the main reasons we moved out and left the house to the kids. The price of rent is cheaper than therapy...lol. We are still pretty much stuck in the ways we have been reacting to each other for the past several years. I can have a very sharp tongue and often use it to try to hurt the other person before they can hurt me. I have to work harder on changing that. Most likely if I change, he will too. We also have issues with intimacy but very different from yours. I believe he has a medical problem and that does undermine his belief in himself. Also he is getting so tired from working so hard. I worry about that. One bad thing in our case right now is that I have been so sick since we moved to this new place so it has been hard for me to do all the little things I want to do like get the place fixed up and cook a meal every night. [/QUOTE]
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