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Maybe End of the Road for State and County Services
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 525548" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>The thing that makes me the most angry about this whole thing is the fact that the program was touted to connect families to services that were not available through any other channel.</p><p></p><p>Instead, I think it is really geared to help kids get out of abusive homes. "Troubled" kids are identified and it is assumed that the behavior stems from a problem at home. And because they don't want to come right out and accuse the parents to their faces - they call it "Family Support Services" and use the kinds of words and phrases that will encourage cooperation from parents and caregivers.</p><p></p><p>So they make arrangements to get people in the home and do what are essentially parenting classes for the adults and they take the kids out to the mall and for ice cream to "give them a break" and "a sense of autonomy" and they try to "fix" the way the parents are treating the child. </p><p></p><p>And when the parents mess up and blow up at the child? The agency offers "respite" to the family by arranging for the child to spend a few days with an approved family while Mom and Dad cool off, get some more parenting skills, and learn how to avoid that sort of blow up again in the future.</p><p></p><p>This is a great system...unless the child really and truly has an issue.</p><p></p><p>And if the child <em>does</em> have an issue? The agency is completely out of their element. NONE of their in-home providers are versed in things like Personality Disorders. And their respite homes? Those are just for a good kid who needs a place to sleep for a couple of days. If the child is the one with a problem, those families don't want to be within hundred miles of <em>that</em> nightmare!</p><p></p><p>So here we are. The State Supservisor can finally admit that WE are not bad parents - and we probably have a lot more skills than the folks they are trying to put into our homes.</p><p></p><p>OK - great.</p><p></p><p>But an ackowledgement of my parenting skill is NOT what I was looking for - it's not what my family needed.</p><p></p><p>My CHILD still needs help.</p><p></p><p>And that's what is SO unfair. </p><p></p><p>I jumped through EVERY hoop. I followed every idiotic therapist and psychiatrist and SW and Behavior Therapist and MST Worker. I went through TWO different parenting programs. I called hospitals and universities and goverment agencies. If there was a possibility of help for my child in the entire state of South Carolina - I went after it.</p><p></p><p>And that's it. I have reached the end of the line. There is nothing left.</p><p></p><p>But is the problem "solved" ? Is everything better now? NO!</p><p></p><p>So what next?</p><p></p><p>Is it time to "Let go and Let G-d" ?</p><p></p><p>???</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 525548, member: 6546"] The thing that makes me the most angry about this whole thing is the fact that the program was touted to connect families to services that were not available through any other channel. Instead, I think it is really geared to help kids get out of abusive homes. "Troubled" kids are identified and it is assumed that the behavior stems from a problem at home. And because they don't want to come right out and accuse the parents to their faces - they call it "Family Support Services" and use the kinds of words and phrases that will encourage cooperation from parents and caregivers. So they make arrangements to get people in the home and do what are essentially parenting classes for the adults and they take the kids out to the mall and for ice cream to "give them a break" and "a sense of autonomy" and they try to "fix" the way the parents are treating the child. And when the parents mess up and blow up at the child? The agency offers "respite" to the family by arranging for the child to spend a few days with an approved family while Mom and Dad cool off, get some more parenting skills, and learn how to avoid that sort of blow up again in the future. This is a great system...unless the child really and truly has an issue. And if the child [I]does[/I] have an issue? The agency is completely out of their element. NONE of their in-home providers are versed in things like Personality Disorders. And their respite homes? Those are just for a good kid who needs a place to sleep for a couple of days. If the child is the one with a problem, those families don't want to be within hundred miles of [I]that[/I] nightmare! So here we are. The State Supservisor can finally admit that WE are not bad parents - and we probably have a lot more skills than the folks they are trying to put into our homes. OK - great. But an ackowledgement of my parenting skill is NOT what I was looking for - it's not what my family needed. My CHILD still needs help. And that's what is SO unfair. I jumped through EVERY hoop. I followed every idiotic therapist and psychiatrist and SW and Behavior Therapist and MST Worker. I went through TWO different parenting programs. I called hospitals and universities and goverment agencies. If there was a possibility of help for my child in the entire state of South Carolina - I went after it. And that's it. I have reached the end of the line. There is nothing left. But is the problem "solved" ? Is everything better now? NO! So what next? Is it time to "Let go and Let G-d" ? ??? [/QUOTE]
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